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Review of On Forgiveness  
Rated: 13+ | (2.5)
Your story was entertaining and a lesson on forgiveness is always welcome. I’m not a religious person, but do study them. Twice the number 7 is used at the beginning of your story. I am curious if this is symbolism to the spiritual meaning of seven; if so, I would like to see it used more through the rest of On Forgiveness. As is, it feels ignorable. I believe one or two more uses later in the story would fortify the symbolism with the reader.
You mention the main character weighing 300+ pounds, which seemed odd. It was the only mention of the characters physical features and didn't seem to add anything. I found myself slightly pulled away. I believe the advantage to On Forgiveness is having no mention of the person’s appearance so it could be anyone. By making the main character obese, it is hard for thinner people to place themselves into the character’s shoes. If this is the experiences of a specific individual, the story focuses way too much on the experience and not the character.
There is also mention of the character fearing being shot; just like her weight, this feels out of place. I don’t think being shot in a funeral is a common fear. Being spiritual, it might be better if the character simply felt unwelcome in the graveyard. If it’s a fear you wish to keep, I suggest writing why the character would have such fears. Were they mugged once and have a fear of being alone? Did this happen in a graveyard?
My final issue was the end; but, this is really just me. The sentence “By the same token, I felt deeply humbled, knowing that I too have wronged others and need to seek forgiveness also” felt like the end to me. Everything after this felt really preachy. I would have preferred coming to my own conclusion about the story over having it so obviously thrown at me.
I did find it an OK read on the whole, but think a few changes would make it a far more powerful read.


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