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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/kaidamei
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2 Public Reviews Given
35 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by J.E. Harshman
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
I really enjoy the character development that's already taking place! The characters of Bryce and Gina are coming through very dominately. It's a great start, and I really liked the opening.

I found that the crime scene opening, while a little cliche, caught the attention of the reader, and the "dump job" pun added a bit of a twist to the norm. I think you could probably strengthen the opening a little more, however, and maybe detail the crime scene a bit more- not so much to be gruesome, but enough to entice the readers...

Id really like to see more of this...great work, and good development!

-Jessica
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