I really liked your story =) it is very imaginative and something different. I really don't tell people what they are doing wrong or right because what is right for them might not be for me so all I like to say is great job and it was entertaining! =)
I really enjoyed reading this! It reminds me of the Goosebumps series in a way but that is a good thing as I still love to read those. Great job! I did not see any errors in it and the formatting was great as well. Excellent!
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