I love the repetition-really effective. And the ending really hits you, I like the monosyllabic conclusion, works really well. Its really raw, I could feel the emotional tension seeping through the words.
I like it. Especially 'I rain', and also the repetition of rain in its different forms. Also like the idea of sharing 'winter', sharing a season of the year. Nice.
I really like the style, its sharp and makes an impact. Syntax is unique. Its a good read. However, the plot is lacking clarity towards the end. Maybe you can review that. Your writing has the potential to evoke a really deep response, but the indiscrete nature of the plot itself is a let down. I also feel like the incident that occurred on the bridge was a bit random and there was lack of explanation as to why it happened and why the act itself was significant to the characters.
But, I love the idea of focusing on a lone incident.
I think you should do some editing on this piece because its worth putting some time into.
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