I like how sincere your poem is. It doesn't feel forced. I think everyone can relate to what you are writing about, especially the fear of giving your heart to someone but still desiring what you said in the third paragraph. Great job!
This is raw and powerful. I love the imagery you use. I can relate to hearing what people/a partner really thought of me behind my back. The choice of using diary entries is unique and interesting. It is almost more like a poem. The narrative flows very well. If I were to ask you anything, it would be more detail about why the fight could never be forgotten about or won. Well done.
I don't normally read Westerns, but this is an especially well done story. It reads with an authentic tone. I laughed at the line about the old lady looking like "the disgraced offspring of an ostrich and a peacock." Most importantly, you got me truly emotionally involved in the story once Anderson stepped in. Great job!
Wow, I really liked the ending! I did not see that coming. I wish it was a little longer, and had a little more depth to it. I think it would have made the suspense and ending even more spectacular. You did a really good job with the description of the setting and mood. What a twist!
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