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Review of Checkout Crisis  
Review by Megabob
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I enjoyed this story very much, just tore through it, and the story's structure, primarily dialogue and short, snappy sentences, made that possible. The structure helps to create a distinctive voice for the narrator.

Tough with the 300-word budget, but one suggestion would be more of the classic show-don't-tell technique. For example, in place of saying that the voice of the self-checker "irritated me," the narrator might say that he slammed the bag of frozen peas onto the counter. You did it well when you had Angela rolling her eyes instead of having the narrator say that she was barely tolerant of the narrator's need for a cart instead of a basket.

Inventive idea, and a fun story!
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