wow. You've had a lot happen to you. :/
I am sorry to hear all of this happened to you, but the same has happened to me. Not so much all of this, but when I was younger, my older brother's best friend took me into my room and molested me. I had no one to tell because I thought they wouldn't believe me. By 12 it had stopped, he was in highschool and could get any girl he wanted. I felt stupid and used. I became depressed and never slept in my room. I'd sleep on my younger brother's bedroom floor, or the living room couch or not even at all. And when I did sleep I had nightmares. My mom sent me to therapy. I never wanted help. I just wanted to tell someone. I know exactly what you mean. I want that innocence back. I want to feel safe in my room. I want to be able to walk into my room and not close my eyes and relive his hands exploring me. I finally told my parents what happened last year. After it happened 11 years ago. I finally was able to move out of that room and into another one. It didn't help, but i was away from the scene. The boy never talks to me, but when we see each other up town the look grows back in his eyes and my chest tightens.
I haven't been able to date or become close with guys because of it.
Fear is a powerful thing. Don't let it hold you back.
If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here.
I really like this. I can feel your frustration through your words and thoughts. Something that would make this flow a little better would be sticking to Iambic Pentameter or some kind of meter. The piece as it stands is raw and (idk if you'll understand what I'm trying to say here,) if it were in pentameter, it would flow smooth, like water, but as it stands right now, it is broken and sharp like rocks. I don't know if you're big into your faith, but I am a Christian and if you ever need to talk I'm here to help you out. (: If not, I'm here as a friend too. All in all, I understand completely how you feel about your faith and being frustrated. Just keep holding on. Things will get better. In life, not every thing has to be explained. Sometimes it's better to sit back and let life do as it pleases.
I love this! When I like to read, I like to be able to close my eyes and imagine what's going on. With this story I can do exactly that. Your description is amazing and I like how you made your characters have such strong personalities. I don't really have any tips, because your writing is really impressing, but if I had to give some, I'd say keep writing, because the world doesn't have enough writers like you. :)
Wow. I love this. haha. It's such a great piece. You have a few grammatical errors, but they're mostly minor. Some of the thoughts you have get jumbled up and become a tad bit confusing, but other than that I really enjoyed reading it. You're an awesome writer. Keep it up! :D I'd love to see more. Please check my stuff out too if you don't mind. I just created my account today.
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/raecas11
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.24 seconds at 7:36am on Apr 26, 2024 via server web1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
