*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/sarahlea1717
Review Requests: OFF
1 Public Reviews Given
1 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Sarah Lea
Rated: E | (3.5)
I think you have a good start. I think the most confusing thing for me is the voice of the piece. It's almost a mix of 1st and 3rd person. It just isn't clear if the voice is a narrator or the main character. If it's a main character, how is the person witnessing this all?

The piece does set the scene fairly well and you also describe the character and surroundings fairly well. Keep up the good work! :)
1 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/sarahlea1717