Great story! Thomas and Silver are very well-developed characters. The plot is introduced and developing nicely. The story is original and well thought out. I like it so far.
Things that could be improved:
The Thantera setting could be described in more detail.
The whole story needs to be proofread and polished up. There are some typos and word confusion.
Other than that, I can't see anything to criticize about this story. It pulls the reader in and keeps his/her interest very well. I can't wait to read more.
Great job!
~Tawnya
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