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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/wethum0713
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Review of Dark Night  
Review by MattMore
Rated: E | (2.5)
Dark Night is well written but can be improved. I like the way the 2 events were tied to together but the transitions, especially the first one is a little confusing an could be changed to make it less so. I like the way you discover that Danny is in a wheel chair instead of the author just coming out and saying so, it uses the "show me don't tell me" technique that could be applied in other areas of the story. My word choices would have been a little different and while that's mostly a matter of taste the author should review his story and remember that in a short story every word counts and should be building the effect he is trying to accomplish with his story. In general a good story and I look forward to reading the next revision.
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