Beautiful Mess

I'm a beautiful mess...can't sleep, can't breathe...because I'm tangled in distress...I'm not really "me"...My reflection speaks lies...The truth I can't see..its covered in disguise...Hurtful thoughts fill my mind...whispers of torture reside...I seek what I can't find...There's nowhere left for my tears to hide...I tremble with fear...when my heart begins to feel...can't let others get near...too afraid of what's real...I try to escape so I close my eyes...my soul seeks comfort...I hope to realize, that despite what I see...staring back at me..I'm beautiful....Its hard to accept that which I believe to be untrue...my brain tells me otherwise...but what else is new?....At night I stay up late and cry...constantly questioning...and asking myself why...wondering when I will finally have peace...my heart is heavy and it needs a release...I'm a beautiful mess...but still nonetheless, I am B E A U T I F U L.