Gutwrench

Gutwrench

Finding the wrong words and failing
Leaving myself flailing,
Attempting to grab your attention,
But still never lifting the tension.

Caught in my own private prison,
A cellblock built by me,
Thrown away the key, afraid to be seen,
Through the cracks in my mask.

Smiles come so easily because they’re cheap,
But never deeply felt, always to help,
Forge a false face for public view.

Wish I could come clean to you, Wish I could have been
Better company for you, made you feel special as you should do.
But these are just the thoughts of the loser, the bruised,
Confused and saddened, guilty and gutwrenched.
Didn’t mention myself to you. Its better off that way.