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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1321788-How-did-they-find-that-out
by Marsh
Rated: · Column · Comedy · #1321788
This is one of my Rambling Prose columns.
Date published - September 2007

How did they
find that out?

I collect trivia. People send me trivia and I save it on a floppy disc. In fact, I had to start another trivia floppy because the first one got filled. I enjoy trivia and will continue to add it to my files. However, I am skeptical about some of the trivia because I question how it was obtained. No one ever documents the research that led to the trivia. Here are a few examples.

A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue. How did the researchers find that out? Did they go around sticking out their tongues at the crocodiles? Maybe the crocodiles were just more polite than the researchers.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds. How did the researchers know that the goldfish was trying to remember something? If it is a senior goldfish, its memory may be even shorter. As a very senior citizen I frequently have the same trouble the goldfish has. I wonder if goldfish have “senior moments” like I do.

A snail can sleep for three years. I’m sure this was discovered by a researcher with Rip Van Winkle tendencies. He put the snail to bed and then he stretched out for a little nap. When he woke up three years later that lazy snail was still sound asleep. Apparently snails do everything at a snail’s pace – even sleeping.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear. How did the researcher get a cat to stay still long enough to count the muscles in its ear? If the ear was not attached to the cat maybe the Humane Society should investigate this obvious case of cat abuse.

Cats have over 100 vocal sounds. This was probably discovered by the researcher who was trying to count the muscles in that cat’s ear. We have a cat that prowls and howls every night in our backyard. I know he – or – she has at least 100 vocal sounds used in its nocturnal caterwauling.

There are more chickens than people in the world. Now that can only result from a wild guess. We have people censuses but I didn’t know we had a chicken census. I wonder if they can register on-line. Or maybe the United Nations has a special unit I haven’t heard of. Maybe they travel all over the world counting chickens.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men. I don’t have a clue how this was discovered. I think a more interesting study would be which one winks the most. Married men would have to be excluded because they know better than to go around winking. Especially at pulchritudinous customers in the local monster mart.

Admittedly I am skeptical of many of the trivia items sent to me. However, I enjoy getting them so if you have any extra trivia cluttering up your computer just e-mail ‘em to me. My e-mail address is 43K@elmore.rr.com.



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