Wish of the Tormented

As the sun fell on that winter day,

Tears fell in the dark hallway.

Instead of insulting you as I always,

My defence broke down and gave to what I’ve desired always.

---

I said comforting words,

Even ones that I myself didn’t believe,

Yet you looked at me with such astonished eyes,

Not from hate, but from disbelief.

---

I guess you wonder:

“Why does this person,

One that always insulted me,

Now give words of wisdom,

To someone like me?”

---

But I never hated you,

I wanted you to detest me,

Even if it pains me…

So one wouldn’t know that I care.

So you wouldn’t be in danger

And make me feel despair.

---

I asked you for a date,

A partner for this night,

In exchange for the comfort,

Or I’ll that tell that you’ve cried.

---

Yet, you merely smiled at my empty threat, before saying yes.

---

I stared at you then,

Observing your childish manner

As you twirled around with laughter on your lips…

---

‘A dream come true’, as people would say.

---

That was when I did one thing that I’ve promised myself not to do,

One that would say ‘I love you’…

I thought you’d pull back, disgusted of my actions,

Yet you did the exact opposite of what I’ve thought:

You’ve returned the gesture.

---

I was amazed,

Overwhelmed of my emotions.

And then I remembered,

The promise that I’ve made…

That’s why I’ll cherish this now,

Savour this as long as it lasts,

For I know that…

We aren’t meant to be.

---

I pulled back, turned, and ran away,

Leaving you with your thoughts,

Alone in the hallway.

---

As the moon shines this fateful day,

And as the heavens cry the tears I cannot,

I leaned at my window, and looked at the seas…

I closed my eyes and let one arrogant tear fall,

Which I know that sooner or later would become…

Suspended in time and space.