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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1363946-This-thing-called-a-brain
Rated: E · Short Story · Experience · #1363946
Comical yet enlightening story based on my day to day life experiences.
This thing called a brain.

The good Lord in his infinite wisdom gave all of us a brain. Yes, believe it or not, you have one too and that neighbour across the street! So since it’s already in our heads and we cannot give it back, let us try to use it. Who knows…… we may even begin to get a little common sense.  So if you get a letter informing you that you have won US$2,500,000.00 in an overseas lottery (that you never bought a ticket for), what would you do?  Well a friend of a friend of mine (let’s call her Pamela) got such a letter.

It happened on a rainy June morning, in a little village, somewhere in Trinidad.  As Pamela sat alone by the window of her cold wooden shack, wondering where she would find her next job and paycheck.  The raindrops fell heavily on the galvanized roof and slowly dripped into her late grandmother's prized coalpot, through the old leak in the kitchen.  In the distance she could see Mr. Johnson, the village postman, struggling with his tiny excuse for an umbrella as he hurriedly tried to stuff some envelopes into Aunt Mabel's postbox.  He was a short, stocky man, with a bad leg and always seemed to be in a rush. 
"Maybe he has some good news for me today", Pamela thought, as she rushed to open the top half of her front door.  The wind was beginning to pick up and blew the rain straight into her face.  She did not seem to notice as she nervously tapped the termite ridden door frame.  It seemed an eternity before Mr. Johnson finally reached her gate that was barely balancing on its last hinge. 
"Morning Johnson, anything good today?", Pamela yelled. 
"Hmph!" was his only reply as Mr. Johnson quickly shuffled off to make his next delivery. 

Pamela bolted outside, headed straight for her mailbox and scooped up her mail.  Her tattered housedress was now drenched with water and was clinging to her like a second skin.  She was soon back inside her house and began to flip through the letters as a pool of water rapidly began to form at her bare manicured feet.  One by one she dropped 'Final Notice' bills in a pile on the ground.  Then something caught her eye.  It was a  small, light green envelope with 'UK Lottery Inc' written in gold to the top left-hand corner.  Pamela's heart skipped several beats as she ever so slowly pealed it open, just like she used to do with her gifts on her birthday, when life was not so hard.  Afraid to look at the letter, she suddenly slammed it on the table, then picked it back up again.  She repeated this routine a few more times then took a deep breath and began to unfold the letter and read its content. 

UK LOTTERY INC
868 Hookery Lane
Liverpool NH93 4RT
England

Ref: UK/9420X2/68
Batch: 074/05/ZY369
                               
                WINNING NOTIFICATION:
We happily announce to you the draw of the UK-LOTTO Sweepstake Lottery
International programs held on the 8th of Febraury, 2007 in
Johannesburg,South Africa.
Your name and address attached to ticket number: 564
75600545 188 with Serial number 5368/02 drew the lucky numbers:
19-6-26-17-35-7, which subsequently won you the lottery in the 2nd category.

You have therefore been approved to claim a total sum of
US$2,500,000.00 (Two million,Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars) in cash
credited to file ktu/9023118308/03.This is from a total cash prize of U.S
$ 2.5 Million dollars, shared amongst the first nine (9) lucky winners
in this category.

All participants were selected randomly through our computer draw system and extracted from over 100,000 companies. This
promotion takes place annually.
Please note that your lucky winning number falls within our European
booklet representative office in Europe as indicated in your play
coupon.In view of this, your U.S$2,500,000.00 (Two million,Five Hundred
Thousand United States Dollars) would be released to you by our payment
office in Europe.

Please note that a fee of US$500.00 must first be paid by you in order to cover European Government Tax Charges and processing fees.  This one time fee can be paid through bank drafts only and addressed to: -

Professor Paul Winters
c/o Liverpool North Post Office
North Liverpool
England



To avoid unnecessary delays and complications, please quote your
reference/batch numbers in any correspondence with us.
Congratulations once more from all members and staffs of this program.
Thank you for being part of our promotional lottery program.


Sincerely,
Professor Paul Winters.
UK-LOTTO Co-ordinator .

Email: paulwinters@tiscali.co.uk
Phone: +11 44 243 789 4685



All Pamela saw was the line saying she won US$2,500,000.00 and began to exclaim,
"Ah rich! Ah rich! Allyuh! Allyuh!", Pamela began to shout at the top of her voice. But then she suddenly became quiet. 
"If dem greedy people find out," she thought, "dey go play dey coming to beg and ting and suck meh dry.  Could this be for real, or am I dreaming?"
All of a sudden the rain stopped, the sun began to peep through the clouds and the longest rainbow Pamela had ever seen stretched across the sky.
"This must be a sign," she thought, "look how rain stopped just so, just so, and the sun and a rainbow appear out of nowhere". 
She needed to get some advice, but from whom?  Pamela tried hard to think of someone as the cobweb ridden wheels in her head slowly began to squeak and turn.
"De Village Guru!" she thought, "he'll know what to do.  Everyone always goes to the Village Guru!"

She quickly changed her clothes, tucked the letter into her pants pocket, picked a few ripe julie mangoes and flew out of her gate to see The Guru. Her neighbours all hailed her out as she passed them, but Pamela, caught up in her plans for the money, saw and heard no one.  The large avacado tree where The Guru sat each day seemed an eternity away.  She finally reached the tree and slowly began to approach The Guru with her hands outstretched with her offering of mangoes.  He was a slim, tall, wise man who made his living off of the gifts bought to him by his 'devotees' in exchange for his infinite wisdom.  Before Pamela could say a word, The Guru boomed,
"Don't do it! It's a curse from the foreign land! They just want your money and you'll never get a dime back." 
Pamela was flabbergasted.  She dropped the mangoes and began to run all the way back home in tears. 

So do you think she heeded his advice and saved herself a great deal of heartache and pain?  Of course not!  Pamela accused The Guru of not wanting her to succeed in life.  She even decided to call the contact number included in the letter and spoke with the ‘gentleman’ listed on her letter, Professor Paul Winters.  Professor Winters assured her that she had nothing to worry about and urged her to send her payment quickly so that she can begin 'living the good life'.  She reasoned with herself that anyone with such a title to their name must be legit.  Being totally convinced she headed straight for the bank downtown to withdraw the last of her savings and sent it to the Professor.  She could almost smell the cash that was soon to be in her hands.

In turn, the Professor kept his word and Pamela is now US$2,500,000.00 richer.  Of course not!  Pamela never saw a dime, lost her US$500.00 and was boldface enough to blame her friends for not warning her. She even demanded that her friends should all compensate her for her lost savings.  You maybe wondering, how can one tell if something is a scam? Well dare I say it? If it sounds too good to be true it usually is.  Besides why should Pamela have sent money to the Professor in order for her to claim her winnings?  Someone with common sense would have reasoned, that if the lottery company was above board they would have simply deducted the charges from Pamela winnings, then sent the balance to her.  It would appear that good old common sense is not so common anymore.  But what has become of Pamela? The last I heard she was invited to invest in an all-inclusive event, but that is another story.   

© Copyright 2007 Darlene Smith (cocoagyul at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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