missing a FRIEND..

it's actually very weird how i come up with the idea of writing this.. you see, i was text messaging a friend and we traveled to different topics until without a flicker of an instant we were talking about my friend here who lives by the next street who died of cancer a few years ago. i was not really comfortable at talking about him, let me tell you that.. but the mere thought of him swelled in my mind until i can't ignore talking about him anymore. i guess i got carried away with my emotions considering when he died i never went to his funeral or something like that. i was afraid and so shocked at that time, i guess. he was my first best friend.he would take me to places so simple yet he would bring my soul to certain horizons no one could ever bring me to. the mere touch of his hands made me feel being pampered with the most delicate silk. his voice were the sweetest sound that my ears can hear. in other words, he was the best thing that ever happened to me. too bad, i was so stupid not to let him know that. not to let him feel that. i never actually cried when he died, i busied myself of a lot of things.
but no matter what i do, there is still a place here in my heart for him, and for him only even up to now. as i am writing this now, my eyes are welling up with tears, i can scarcely see.., and with that, i will leave you.