How Does It Feel?

This was not how it was supposed to be,
living my life without you.
Waking up each morning knowing you don't care,
yet still hanging onto hope that you do.

What was so bad that you felt you had to leave?
How could you abandon what had taken years to build?
You will never know the pain you caused
By packing up and leaving without a thought, or a care.

I am different now, and have been since you left.
But what would you expect from a wounded heart?
What used to be so warm, open, and trusting,
is now cold, calloused, and timid...
Because of you.

I've spent years trying to forgive you for the pain,
trying to look past the selfishness and the lies.
But you were the one person that was never supposed to let me down,
and the fact that you did... is unforgivable.

You think you deserve to be trusted and loved by me again?
I'm sorry mom, but you are sorely mistaken.
What you did to our family was the ultimate betrayal
And you will never deserve a place in my heart... or my life.

So this is goodbye, farewell, good riddance
Don't bother trying to call... I won't answer the phone.
And when you show up at my door... I won't be there for you.
How does it feel?