Dare: Chapter 3 - 5.5

Chapter 3

Session One

           

          “What else?” I asked softly. I could tell that Gabriel was smiling without even looking at him. I ducked my head slightly

          “The Others; they don’t speak or make any sound. It gets creepy sometimes. The Rebels: Renegade Angels that were clipped of their wings and sent to different parts of the world. A good lot of them are sent to jails and prisons not long after being on Earth.”

          “Why?” I asked. “Are they dangerous?”

          “Oh, yes.” Gabriel replied with a small sigh. “Extremely. That’s why their wings were clipped to begin with. They used their power to hurt people, rather than to help them and lead them.”

          “So…who controls everything? God?” He laughed.

          “I don’t know. We don’t really talk about it.”

          “How many Angels of Death are there?” I asked. I finally met his eyes.

          “Enough to get the job done.” He replied simply.

          “You understand now, don’t you?” Gabriel asked and he suddenly seemed embarrassed. I nodded mutely, focusing my gaze on my hands folded tightly in my lap. He reached forward and rested one hand over my knotted fingers. I tensed.

          “Please…don’t be afraid.” He begged. I didn’t dare look at him.

          “Why did you have to take them?” My voice was soft and slightly broken. Gabriel  sighed softly and shook his head.

          “I didn’t have a choice. Don’t think I wouldn’t have prevented it if I could have. Their numbers were up…it’s not anything I can control.” I nodded again, but I didn’t fully understand.

          “Will I see them again?”

          “Not for a very long time.” He told me softly. With my gaze still fixed on my hands, I opened them wide to prevent the tears that had gathered there from falling. He moved his hand from my fingers to my cheek and wiped away the traitors that had escaped.

          “I’m so sorry.”





          I had my first counseling session the next day, and it went exactly as I thought it would. For the first few minutes my counselor, Gordon, and I stared at each other, challenging the other to say something. Finally, he cleared his throat.

          “Do you know why you’re here?” He asked.

          “Because I’ve shown signs of depression and suicide.” He deliberated.

          “I didn’t hear about that last bit...”

          “That’s probably because I’m lying to you.” I countered. He quirked an eyebrow at me and frowned.

          “Okay. Being completely honest, do you know why you’re here?”

          “Of course I do.” I stopped, and he waited.

          “And…?”

          “I saw my best friend get killed and my parents died…why else would I be here other than for you to pick my brain…the way it probably shouldn’t be… and tell me things I already know?” Gordon shrugged.

          “I don’t blame you for not wanting to be here. No one wants to hear that they’re ill--.”

          “I’m not.” He smiled a little too sweetly.

          “Of course not, dear. You are aware that depression is a mental illness, I’ll assume. You seem like a bright young lady.”

          “Yeah, and I also know that you don’t know what you’re talking about.” Gordon looked annoyed now, and I felt a twinge of triumph. I sat back in my squishy chair and folded my arms across my stomach.

          “You may think that the way you’re dealing with this is right, but it’s actually not. Burying your emotions isn’t healthy, Ms. Adler, and pretending that nothing’s happened is really only making it worse because you’re going to have to acknowledge it at some point.” I shook my head at him.

          “I’m perfectly healthy, but thank you for your concern.” I stood up. “Are we done here?”

          “It seems,” Gordon said. I sighed and sat back down. “that when cooperation fails, you resort to hostility.” My eyes narrowed as I glared at him.  “I’ll break through your walls, Ms. Adler, no matter how hard I have to fight. We’re done.”



          At home, Andre attempted his own form of counseling me, but this I preferred because he added food to the therapy. He ordered both Chinese and Mexican because he didn’t know which one I’d want more. I wanted both, and together we ate the entire mass of food that he’d ordered. For the first time in an entire year, I was happy and I didn’t feel guilty about it.

         “How did your session go?” Andre asked finally, licking sweet-and-sour sauce off of his fingers. I looked up at him abruptly.

         “Are you serious?” I asked. He nodded slowly with a blank expression. “Gordon and I have a bit of a disagreement.”

         “I don’t understand.”

         “He says I’m mentally ill. I disagree.”

         “He told you that?” Andre asked in astonishment. I nodded and took a bite out of a bean burrito.

         “Yep,”

         “He’s wrong, I can tell you that.” I smiled slightly.

         “Thanks, Andre.” I said. “So…do I have to go back?”

         “Absolutely,” My mouth fell open.

         “What? Why?”

         “Because I said so. Wow…I’ve been waiting for a chance to use that on you. It feels good.” He smirked. “Go to bed. You have to go back to school tomorrow.” I suppressed a groan and stood up, carrying my soiled dishes into the kitchen and rinsing them off before dragging myself up the stairs.

         I didn’t fall asleep right away. I knew that when I did I’d see Gabriel again. So I paced my room a few times then settled down in my chair with my copy of Persuasion by Jane Austen. Lady Russell’s name barely flashed into my vision before I was drifting on a cloud that lingered between consciousness and sleep.

But he was with me on that cloud… Gabriel was. And he didn’t look the least bit happy.

         “You’re seeing a counselor?” He asked. His voice was strained as though he was trying very hard to control it. I quirked an eyebrow at him.

         “Can I rest assured that you won’t pick my brain like he is or should I just go ahead and put up some walls?” Gabriel wasn’t amused, and the look he gave me along with his eerie silence made me shrink like a raisin. “For the record, I didn’t have a choice. My godfather sent me. I didn’t want to go…still don’t.”

         “Remy, you can’t tell him about me or anything that we’ve discussed. Can I trust you with that?”

         “What happens if I say no?” I ventured. The pained expression that I hated was painted on his perfect face again. I frowned…obviously the answer wasn’t good.

         “This all stops…I can’t come back, and your memory is erased.” My mouth fell open and I didn’t trust my legs to support me. I sat down gingerly on the cloud.

         “You’ll catch flies if your mouth stays open like that.” Gabriel pointed out. “Can I trust you, or not?” I nodded slowly and he released a breath that I didn’t notice he’d been holding. He sat down in front of me, closer than usual and took both of my hands in his.

         “Out of curiosity,” I began slowly and looked up to gouge his expression. He waited patiently for me to continue. “Why can’t I tell? I won’t! Don’t worry, I won’t tell, but I just want to know why.” Gabriel deliberated, his face pinched in thought.

         “It’s…difficult to explain, really. Humans aren’t supposed to know about Angels unless an Angel has been sent as a Lighter. If word got out, we wouldn’t be able to help people the way we do.”

         “But I know about you.” I countered. He nodded.

         “I guess you can say I’ve been promoted.” I tilted my head to one side in confusion.

         “I’ve been sent to guide you through everything you’ve seen…everything you’ve yet to see.”

         “There’s more?” I asked and tried to swallow the lump which had lodged itself in my throat. He inched closer and squeezed my fingers.

         “There will be, I hate to say.” My eyes wandered to look at something beyond his head and I felt numb again. My mouth was dry and the damn lump in my throat wouldn’t go away no matter how many times I swallowed at it. 

         “Remenyke, I’ve been sent to help you through this, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. I promise.” He moved to sit next to me and wrapped his arms around me, pressed my head to his shoulder. And there I cried. I cried until the lump in my throat wasn’t a golf ball anymore, but a basket ball. I cried until my nose and eyes were raw. I cried until my lungs burned from hyperventilation. I cried until Gabriel’s shirt was soaked with my tears. He didn’t seem to care about the shirt, though. His main concern was me and my well being. He stroked my hair and my back and whispered nonsense into my ear until my sobs subsided and I was breathing almost normally. When I was only sniffing, he lifted my face with both of his hands and kissed my forehead. Then he moved away and he dried the rest of my tears with his sleeves.

         “If I could make it all stop, I would.” He assured me. I nodded slowly and looked down at the white arms which enveloped me and kept me safe. And I felt safe with him, no matter what my instincts said: that he was dangerous and he was going to hurt me. But in this comfortable casing of warm porcelain arms, I didn’t care about that. In the short time that I had known an Angel, he had become my friend, my guardian and the baseball bat that occasionally knocked my head back into reality.

         “Take me away with you?” I whispered. I didn’t even remember thinking the words before they were out of my mouth. Gabriel smiled softly and pressed his forehead to mine.

         “If only I could. But it’s not that simple. If could, I would take you far, far away from here where no one and nothing could hurt you.” All right, that sounded a bit strange coming from an almost stranger, but it was another thing I couldn’t bring myself to care about. I locked my eyes with his, searching…searching…for something I couldn’t put my finger on. He was searching my eyes, as well, the intensity of them burned deep into my mind until I thought that I would have the imprints of his irises tattooed onto my cerebellum. He broke the stare finally because I couldn’t and kissed my forehead again.

         “It’s time to wake up, Remenyke.” I shook my head.

         “I don’t want to.” My voice sounded childish and whiny and a pout would have fit perfectly, but I didn’t go that far. Gabriel took my hands and hauled me to my feet, then let go immediately. And I was falling off of the cloud back into my bed where I jerked awake.



         My clothes hung more loosely than they had only a few weeks ago. I’d lost a few pounds. The black sweater-dress I’d chosen for Erin’s funeral didn’t look as nice as it had for my parents’ memorial. I was starting to think that the lump in my throat was, in fact, turning into a tumor and I would suffocate soon. My face was flushed from my accelerated heart rate and blood pressure. I was dreading the event which would happen in only an hour and I wanted nothing more than to crawl back into bed and sleep through the entire thing. But that would be disrespectful and this was my last chance to apologize and make amends. Hopefully Erin’s ghost wouldn’t haunt me after all. Maybe I could let it all go.

         A soft knock on my door forced me to tear my eyes away from the reflection of The Incredible Shrinking Girl. I answered the door slowly.

         “Are you ready?” Andre asked. I opened the door wider to let him in and nodded reluctantly.

         “As ready as I’ll ever be.” I straightened my dress again and smoothed my hair which I had straightened to hang long down to the middle of my back. Andre was watching me with great caution. “You look at me like I’ll catch fire…” I pointed out. He shrugged.

         “Maybe I’m afraid you will.”

         “I’m fine. Can we just go?” Andre nodded.

         “Aaron’s downstairs waiting for you.” This forced me to move a bit faster and I almost fell down the stairs in my haste. Andre caught me and prevented me from doing any damage. I smiled gratefully at him.

         Aaron was dressed very modestly in a dark sweater and black dress pants. His blonde hair was neatly parted off to one side and he looked solemn; almost as solemn as I felt. I walked toward him quickly and he immediately took me into his arms in a tight, reassuring hug. I buried my face in his shoulder and willed my tears to stay in their ducts. Aaron pressed his lips to my temple and smoothed my hair back from my face.

         “Can I take you to lunch after this is over?” he asked. I tilted my head to one side.

         “I suppose. I’m not really hungry, though.”

         “That’s what worries me.” His eyes traveled down my body and back to my face.

         “Okay!” Andre stepped between us, facing me and ushered both Aaron and I out of the front door and into his car. I took the front seat next to Andre because I knew there was only so much he could handle, whether Aaron was my best friend or not. Despite my hate for the music, the other two people in the car enjoyed heavy metal, so I knew I had to grin and bear it. Besides, the crash symbols and raw guitars helped block out my own thoughts.



         I sat between both Andre and Aaron at the church service. I finally let myself cry…again…for the loss of my best friend. Andre held my hand tightly and Aaron rubbed his hand across my shoulders. He shed a few tears as well, but I think he was really trying to stay strong for me. I wished he wouldn’t.

         “And though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil…” My tears fell heavier and more quickly.

         “Poor child. She was so young.” The ice in my chest began to melt, slowly and painfully.

         “Erin didn’t deserve this…” An invisible knife forced its way into my lungs.

         “I’m so sorry for your loss.” I just wanted to be numb… I couldn’t see, everything was dark and I couldn’t tell where I was going. I collided with a large someone and narrowly missed falling on my rear when two hands gripped my upper arms.

         “I’m sorry…” I mumbled. “I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

         “Never mind. Don’t let it happen again.” The voice was deep and harsh, one I’d heard five days out of the week. Mr. Stanley. I suppressed my surprise at his attendance to Erin’s funeral.

         “Of course. My apologies again.” I turned and collided again with someone.

         “You look like you’re going to collapse, Remy.” Aaron said. I reached up to wipe away my tears quickly and was rewarded with sight. Aaron looked concerned and forced me through the crowds of people toward Andre who looked even more concerned than Aaron. He walked quickly toward me and they each took one of my arms and led me out of the room, then out of the entire building. Andre pushed me into his car like a police officer would do with a criminal and Aaron climbed into the back. Andre got into the driver’s side and started the car.

         “I didn’t get to say goodbye to everyone.” I complained. Andre scoffed.

         “I’m sure they’ll live. You need to eat and sleep.” I was tired. My eyes were drooping even as I tried to stay conscious. But I didn’t feel hungry. The looks Andre kept shooting at me escaped most of my notice. I rested my head against the car window. It was cool against my forehead which suddenly felt very hot.

         “Is she okay?” I heard Aaron ask. His voice sounded like he was at the opposite end of a long tunnel. It echoed. Are voices supposed to do that in cars?

         “I don’t know…” Andre said softly. He sounded like he was at the end of a shorter tunnel, but he echoed, too. I clamped my hands over my ears to block out their voices. I could hear a rushing now.

         When I woke up, I was cradled in Aaron’s arms and he was carrying me into the house. I was still groggy and my stomach ached terribly like I hadn’t eaten in quite some time, which wasn’t entirely true. I ate a little every day.

         Aaron laid me gently on the living room couch and knelt down so that he was almost eye-level. His eyebrows were creased in a worried line on his forehead. I could hear Andre in the kitchen, rifling through the refrigerator.

         “You’ll get premature wrinkles.” I said softly and smiled. Aaron spared me a small twitching of the lips and gently cupped my cheek in his hand.

         “I’m worried.” He said simply. He traced the dark circles that I knew were under my eyes.

         “I didn’t notice.”

         “Remy, can you please just be serious for once? I’m really worried. I don’t want to lose you, too…” I frowned and sat up, pressing his hand to my face. His expression didn’t change at all until I leaned forward and kissed his cheek.

         “Aaron, you’re like a brother to me. I don’t want to do anything to hurt you.” He frowned a little and looked down at his knees.

         “Like a brother…” He repeated in a monotone. “I think it’s fair for you to know that I don’t love you like a sister…” My eyebrows shot up into my hairline. He shrank back slightly. “I just…love you.” I let his hand drop from my cheek and looked down at my hands, folded tightly in my lap.

Chapter 4

Normality

         Things were awkward with Aaron for a while. I couldn’t help but notice things I hadn’t before. Like, when he looked at me, it suddenly occurred to me that it wasn’t in a brotherly or friendly fashion as I thought it was only a couple of days ago. I was starting to watch my words and actions and also started to watch his reactions to the things that I said or did. But this only made him more upset than he was before.

         “I’m sorry, Remy.” He said one day. I was taken by surprise. We were leaning against the stone wall just outside of the local gas station, drinking slushies.

         “What for?” I asked. “You haven’t done anything.” I took a drink from my slushy and winced as the cold went to my brain.

         “I shouldn’t have said anything about how I feel…it really wasn’t my place. I’m sorry.” I shrugged and took another drink. Aaron frowned and pushed the contents of his slushy around the plastic cup.

         “So is that it, then?” He asked. “We just forget about it?”

         “That depends.”

         “On what?”

         “Do you feel better that you said it, or does it make things worse?” I looked over at him and waited for a response. He hesitated.

         “You’ve been acting really weird about it, so I want to say that it’s made things worse.” I opened my mouth to say something reassuring, but nothing came out. I looked down into my own plastic cup in silence.

         “I don’t know how to act.” I admitted after a moment of silence.

         “Just act like yourself, Remy.” Aaron told me. I frowned and put down the drink I had just lost interest in.

         “I don’t think I know how to anymore.” He turned confused eyes in my direction and reached down to take my hand.  His thumb traced small circles on my palm.

         “What do you mean?” I ran my hand through my mop of hair.

         “It’s…complicated. I don’t think you’d understand.” Aaron dropped my fingers and I crossed my arms over my chest.  He was frowning, his eyebrows pulled together into one line. I vaguely thought about reminding him of early wrinkles again. But I didn’t say it.

         “You really want me to talk?” He nodded and turned his full attention on me.  I looked down at my shoes. They needed to be replaced. I sighed and pulled my hair out of my face again.

         “I just don’t feel like myself. I don’t feel like the Remy I was last year. I don’t like the same things I had… Most of the time I just want to be alone.”

         “Do you want to be alone right now?” I shook my head. He put an arm around my shoulders and I leaned into him.

         “I don’t know what’s happening to me.” I mumbled. Aaron sighed and together we headed back up to my house.



         School was starting to feel more normal than it had been; as normal as it could be without Erin around to talk me out of my bad moods. It had only been a week, but I was able to walk down the hallway without receiving a sympathetic glance from anyone. Everyone except my teachers. All of them, with the exception of Mr. Stanley, called me up to their desk after class at least once a week to check and see how I was doing. Every time I told them I was fine. I was just fine. I smiled when it was appropriate, spoke when I was spoken to or had something to say, and cried when no one was looking, except maybe Gabriel. Andre even began to treat me normally again…as normally as I could be treated. Aaron and I decided it would be best if we spent less time together so that he could get a hold on his feelings. I agreed that it was a good idea and we only spoke when we absolutely had to. I spent more time at home than out and about with friends. It seemed that all of the people I’d enjoyed being around only a year ago couldn’t say three words without getting on my nerves. I spent a lot of nights alone with my Angel.

         This dream was less realistic than the others. Gabriel wasn’t with me, and when I realized he wasn’t coming, I panicked slightly. I was standing up on a stool in the English classroom at school, reaching for a book. I had almost reached it while the entire class was watching, when my foot slipped. The stool folded in on itself and I went down. I landed on my ankle at an awkward angle and I heard the snap of my bone before I felt the pain.

         I woke up and immediately reached for my ankle. I twisted it up, down, back and fourth. Everything seemed as it had been when I went to sleep. Nothing was broken. I sighed in relief, smiling to myself. I ran a hand through the mop that was my hair and looked over at my alarm clock. Half an hour until the alarm would go off. I had time to get a shower and have some breakfast.

         Andre had already left for work, which was early for him. Maybe he had some extra hours to fill or he was taking someone’s shift the office. After I ate a bowl of cereal and tied on my tennis shoes, I scooped my bag up off of stairs and left the house, locking the door behind me.  The sun was brighter than usual, blinding me as I stepped out of my house.  I raised my hand, using it as a shield over my eyes, and saw someone walking toward me. It looked like a boy, my age or maybe a year or so older. He walked gracefully, more gracefully than I’d seen most males walk. My heart fluttered when I saw the sun reflect off of his shining black hair.

         Gabriel was walking toward me in all his glory. I pinched my own arm, hard, to make sure I wasn’t dreaming again. It hurt and the pain proved that I was, in fact, awake. My heart fluttered again and I pressed my free hand to my chest. The early sun light reflected off of my Angel’s perfect white teeth when he grinned at me.

         I was frozen. My brain felt like it was melting inside of my skull and I stared at Gabriel with a completely, blank, stupid look on my face. His grin widened and he reached up to remove my fingers from my throat. I shook my head mechanically, trying to clear the eighteen-trillion thoughts rushing through it and bit down on my lower lip. He was actually here, alive –so to speak- and in my front yard.

         “Are you okay?” Gabriel asked, still grinning fantastically. I swallowed once and shook my head again.

         “Yes.”

         “Not what you were expecting, huh?”

         “No. What are you doing here?” I asked, shifting my bag so it was over my shoulder.

         “I figured it was time I furthered my education.” He said in a mysterious voice and lifted his blue eyes to the sky. I was confused for a moment, and then I caught his drift.

         “Wait—you’re coming to school with me?” Gabriel shrugged carelessly. He seemed less uptight than usual as he took my hand in his –they were still warm- and began to lead me in the direction of the school.

         “Why not?” He said. I wondered if he’d thought about enrollment and all of the paperwork. “Don’t worry,” he said as though I’d thought out loud. “It’s all taken care of” His voice pulled me from my thoughts and I looked up at him in confusion.

         “What, are you reading my thoughts now?” I asked, laughing slightly. Gabriel shook his head.

         “No, you’re just very readable. I can’t read thoughts,” He laughed as though that was the most ridiculous thing in the world. “This isn’t a fairy tale.” He looked down at me and smirked. I smiled back. Despite his statement, I felt as though I’d been dropped into a very uncontrollable, very hectic, very disturbing fairy tale. I wouldn’t tell Gabriel that, though.

         We walked in silence; I reveled in the way his hand felt in mine. The school came into view and when we were a few feet away from the front doors, Gabriel released my hand. I frowned up at him slightly but he only grinned and walked ahead of me, holding the door open for me to enter the school.

         “Go to class,” His voice was right next to my ear and I twisted my neck to see that he was very close to me. “I’ll see you there.” His grin widened as he ushered me off in the way of my first class. I glanced over my shoulder to see that he was headed into the admissions office. I dropped my bag and coat into my locker, scooped up my English books and headed to my first class.

         Ms. Anderson had already started class and it was only thirty-two seconds past the hour. I slipped through the back of the class and took an empty seat next to Aaron. He glanced at me curiously, as did Rachel Hawthorn in the desk on the opposite side. I’d never been late to class. Ms. Anderson shot me an irritated look, picked up her grade book and, being very obvious about it, put a check mark in what I knew to be the tardy box next to my name. I groaned to myself and slid further into my chair. I saw Aaron slip a smirk out of the corner of my eye. This was amusing to him.

         About five minutes into the class, the door opened. When it swung, it was quieter than it had been when I’d walked into class. I looked up and saw Gabriel. Ms. Anderson’s annoyance vanished when he flashed his teeth in a brilliant grin. She stood up hastily and held her hand out, which he shook politely. He introduced himself as Gabriel Baker, probably a name he came up with off of the top of his head, and Ms. Anderson showed him to an empty desk right up front –away from me. I tried to hide my disappointment. 

         The class seemed to go on for several hours rather than one. We were currently reading the many works of Edgar Allen Poe and Gabriel knew the answer to every question Ms. Anderson shot at us. She was very impressed with him. It didn’t surprise me. He was an Angel, after all, and I had no idea what year he’d been born and what year he’d died. Or if he had been born at all.

         

Chapter 5

Hope

         After first hour ended, I slipped out at the back of the line that consisted of my class mates. I was surprised at myself, actually hoping that I had missed Gabriel. I felt inferior compared to him with his brilliance and beauty. But he was waiting for me, just outside of the class. I thought about just walking by, ignoring him and continuing on to my locker. But my feet betrayed me and I halted right in front of him. He flashed his perfect white teeth at me and I couldn’t help but to smile back.

         “So,” I said in attempt to start a conversation. Gabriel smirked down at me.

         “So?”

         “You, uhm, did really well in English.” I jabbed my thumb behind us in the direction of the class we’d just left. He chuckled at my awkwardness and nodded. 

         “I like Poe.” He said.

         “How did you know all of the answers?” I asked. “Even the honor roll students looked stumped at a few of them.” Gabriel hesitated.

         “I’ve had time to find them out.” He replied, locking his gaze with mine. His eyes were intense, incredibly so, as though he was trying to force me to see something.

         “How much time have you had?” We stopped at my locker and I dialed the combination before stuffing my English and grammar books inside. I grabbed my Anatomy and Physiology book and, clutching it to my chest, looked up at him expectantly. He looked torn, like he was trying to decide whether or not it was a good idea to tell me how long he’d been around.

         “Well, I—“

         “Remy!” I looked over Gabriel’s shoulder and saw Aaron waving at me and walking at a quick pace toward my locker. I waved back half-heartedly, irritated at him for interrupting.

         “Hi, Aaron,” I said when he stopped next to me, facing Gabriel. Aaron had a very fake smile stretched across his boyishly cute face and his stance was protective, halfway in front of me. I wanted to yell ‘Down boy!’ and smack his nose, but I didn’t. I eased him out of his stance with a hand on his shoulder and stepped forward.

         “Aaron, this is Gabriel Baker. He’s new here, just transferred from…” I looked over at Gabriel questioningly, testing his preparations.

         “Detroit.” He finished my sentence automatically and leaned casually against a locker with his arms folded across his chest. Aaron raised an eyebrow and looked over at me. I hid a smile at how natural Gabriel seemed.

Ms. Anderson wasn’t the only teacher to treat Gabriel special. He’d managed to tweak his schedule to match mine; all but art class. I had art class alone. I was hoping he’d been switched into the sour Mr. Stanley’s class with me for protection from the teacher’s razor-shooting tongue, but I’d had no such luck. Instead of art, Gabriel was taking an independent math class.

Mr. Stanley was in a particularly foul mood when I entered his class. He’d apparently heard about the ‘perfect’ new student and was hoping to get some fresh meat to cook up and devour. I couldn’t help smiling at his disappointment and received a rather nasty glare from the cold-hearted teacher. I sat in my assigned seat and his behind my hair, grinning even more. Art class was particularly entertaining because for once I wasn’t the target of Mr. Stanley’s attack. I drew idly in my sketchbook while he swooped in on unexpecting teenagers as they worked on their art projects.

Rachel Hawthorn, the girl who’d been sitting next to me in English, took a seat next to my while Stanley was antagonizing petit, ballet obsessed Cami Knott. I hadn’t noticed Rachel, as my attention was focused on poor Cami who just wanted to study her Edgar Degas book. Rachel tapped me on the shoulder. I was surprised because she didn’t talk to me often. I turned my attention to her excited face.

“Do you know Gabriel Baker?” She asked intently. I leaned back in my chair slightly and fixed her with an even gaze. Was I supposed to say no? Yes? I don’t know, ask me later? Too bad I didn’t have my Magic 8 Ball with me; I could have made this conversation fast and easy.

“Uhm, yeah,” I mumbled and quickly lowered my eyes. Rachel fluttered her hands uselessly in excitement for a moment and put a hand on my arm. I looked back up at her, resisting the urge to snatch my arm back. She looked so incredibly like she was on the verge of wetting herself that I didn’t want to push her over the edge and end up having to clean up the mess.

“Will you introduce me?” She asked with a big, foolish grin on her face. I studied her for a moment. She had perfectly straight brown hair and clear, ivory-toned skin. I frowned slightly and thought I might actually be selfish enough to say no. But I didn’t.

“Of course,” I said through an extremely fake grin. Rachel clapped me on the shoulder and stood up quickly, the chair legs scraped painfully against the concrete floor. No sooner had she stood up that Aaron had taken her place, smiling smugly.

“It looked like your eyes were screaming.” He said and chuckled.

“I was screaming on the inside. Now I know why I never spoke to her. She’s crazy!” I spoke in a quiet voice incase Rachel might have been close by. Aaron grinned at me and patted me on the shoulder. It felt right, like it had before his uncomfortable confession. I smiled at him.

“So, how do you know the new guy?” He asked casually. I looked down at my sketchbook. A decent likeness of my Angel had penciled its way onto the paper. I quickly flipped the book shut before anyone had the change to notice what I’d drawn.

“I just know him from around.” I answered simply and sheepishly. If Aaron knew I was hiding something, he didn’t say a word to make me continue and tell him the truth.

Mr. Stanley migrated his way to Aaron and I. We both stopped talking, stiffened automatically, and kept statue-like, hoping he’d move on. But he didn’t. He lingered at our table, his eyes fixed on the sketchbook pinned to the table by my forearms. I glanced up at him nervously. His eyes flickered from my hands, gripping the edge of the pad, to the book itself several times before he snatched it up with lightening speed. I gasped and tried to grab it back, but he was faster. He flipped through different images I’d sketched; most of the subjects were my parents. My mother in her wedding dress, my parents laughing with each other, caught in an eternal dance, my father with his first dog. Stanley ran through picture after picture of my family, his face slowly lost all emotion, all anger, and the pages began to slow. I breathed a sigh of relief when he closed the pad before he’d made it to the end and handed it back to me wordlessly. He glanced down at me and I realized I’d had tears in my eyes both from the fear of him seeing my drawing of Gabriel and my fear of revealing the secrets about how much I really miss my parents. I clutched the book to my chest for a moment then placed it carefully back on the table. Aaron watched the entire thing with his mouth hanging open slightly.

Class ended rather abruptly. Usually people file out slowly, but everyone had cleaned up early this time and we were out just as the bell rang. Mr. Stanley didn’t speak to anybody for the rest of the period. I escaped at the back of the class with Aaron, who remained quite close; probably to protect me should I be attacked again. I kept my sketchbook clutched to my chest and my head down as I walked. Gabriel was just outside the door waiting for me, bless his heart. I looked up slowly. Aaron, who’d kept an arm around my shoulders as we left the room, quickly removed it and shoved his hands in his pockets. I eyes felt red and swollen; Gabriel was probably tired of seeing me cry.

“What happened?” The question was directed at Aaron, as I’d turned away from the both of them and started down the hall. They followed after me, but I took a sharp turn into the girls’ bathroom. I was actually surprised when they didn’t follow me in there and breathed a sigh of relief when I was alone. I turned the faucets on all the way for some noise and took a deep breath before turning the water off and leaving the bathroom again. Gabriel and Aaron were waiting on either side of the door. What would they have done if I hadn’t been the only one in the bathroom?