The Almost Kiss

We lay so close. So close. The movie we were supposed to be watching faded away with each passing minute. For within these few moments the world stood still for our place together. Winter, spring, summer, and fall all fell away through time. All four seasons felt their way through the room, as closer and closer you held me.

At this moment, another moment in time, you were no longer my friend, but the object of some long locked up secret inside. My heart ached in apprehension. My arms found their way to you. To me, this time was new. Like the first spring day of the year, so crisp and clean. My whole self in that moment was for you. My trust found its way through my soul's walls. It came through the secrecy and the jumbled thoughts. It came through the fear. It came through the pain of time past.

I remember, tighter and tighter you held me. Closer and closer we became. Your fingers grazed through my hair. Each finger found its place, holding on with such intensity. Our faces were so close now. Our eyes closed, only daring to peak their way into the circumstances to catch a glimpse of the sought after beauty before them.

How close, oh how close our lips came. I felt your heartbeat. It broke the seemingly motionless moment with a melodic blend of beatings. Tighter you held me. The surface of my lips rang with anticipation! Each sweet breath from you swept across the surface with brilliance. That night our breathing danced. It said what we could not. It did what we dare not do. Closer and closer our lips came still. A fleeting choice away, so easily could the engaging satisfaction be met.

Our eyes closed, breath escaping from the deepest depths of our lungs in a unison of sorts. How sweetly your fingers still remained latched into my hair. You held me so close, so tight, as the world stood still. Closer and closer we came to the dangerous and anomalous commitment of a kiss. How my heart did cry to kiss you! How my body called for it!

But, alas, from my own frightened logic, and moral decisions I did not act. But oh how I wanted to have your lips traverse across that last breath and connect with mine. Oh, to have kissed you like I wanted! But it is not so. In an instant, time reared back into focus. Noise and logic filled the room once more. The materials around us seemed to reappear under the disappointment of a moment lost. Then you went home, and I sat alone.