Hasty climb - sudden fall

It took Katia several weeks to design a cunning plan run off to a nunnery in the suburbs of Moscow for the whole summer. She asked  her friend’s mother to call her parents and to convince them that it would be a shame for a girl to spend the entire summer in the stuffy city.
-           “We’re moving to our country house. Why don’t we take Katia with us?” 
Katia’s friend and her mom were held for questioning and finally the long awaited permission was received.
The truth was that Katia never planned to stay at anyone’s country house. She already decided to spend the summer at the nunnery. Who cares that Katia was a shameless liar – it was all for the good cause. God would certainly approve of it. After all, the main goal of an orthodox Christian is to seek for the heavenly realm. Eternal salvation was worth using every trick in the book.
Katia’s parents were not religious, rather atheists. Although they always respected their daughter’s decisions.  One day she announced that instead of entering  one of the most prestigious institutes in Moscow – the institute of foreign relations, she decided to become a theologist. In fact, there was no way they could talk her out of it since she already successfully passed all the entering exams and was admitted to the faculty of Germanic languages.
Katia’s interest in religion was taken as total madness and caused many concerns. There was no chance they would let a 16 year old girl spend three months with religious fanatics. Religious fanaticism spreads like disease. What if their dear girl got infected?
The idea of spending the summer in a real nunnery with righteous  humble looking nuns , dressed in black robes gave Katia the neophyte  feeling of transcendence and spirituality. Religion was banned in Russia for over  70 years  and now that the ban was lifted attending church services, going to communion and wearing  ridiculous outfits was becoming fancy and fashionable. What better way for a teenager to stand out in the crowd than to put on a long shapeless skirt , cover head with a scarf and walk around with a downcast look.
An ancient nunnery, almost completely destroyed after the revolution , now being rebuilt was a perfect place for asceticism and self-sacrifice. Katia already pictured the divine light of the nimbus above her head, which would by all means brighten the sinful world around her at the end of the summer.
Katia arrived at the monastery with two group mates from the teological institute. They were met by the strict and reserved mother –superior and escorted to the so called “pilgrims house”. Pilgrims house, unlike the sisters premises, was more of a hut or a barn.  A lopsided building with shabby stairs, squeaky wooden floors, with a wash basin in the middle of the corridor. The wash basin was simply a plastic bowl with a hole, nailed to the wall  with a bucket underneath. All the inhabitants took turns bringing water from the well to fill the bowl and to take out the bucket with used water when it filled.
Naturally, the toilet was outside the nunnery walls in the middle  of the vegetable patch. A wooden construction with a hole in the middle is familiar to any Russian cottager.  The giant cracks in the wall left no room for doubt whenever the facility was occupied and the fragrance it shed allowed to accurately identify its location. Anyway, the pilgrims always held using it to the last minute . 
The girls climbed up the steep  stairs to the second floor dragging their belongings and stopped before a veneer door carelessly smeared with cheap grey paint. A piece of paper with a prayer on it was pinned to the door. Everyone had to read the prayer and were only allowed to enter after hearing AMEN in response.
-          “Our Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy upon us!”
-          “AMEN”.
Four  metal net beds with planks instead of mattresses and a table was the only furnishing, self-made iconostasis covered most of the wall. That was a wonderful start – austere and ascetic atmosphere was ideal for Katia’s spiritual perfection  and strengthening of faith. And, besides, on one of the beds sat a perfect specimen for practicing humanity and revealing Katia’s numerous Christian virtues.  A young, slightly plump lady sat, legs crossed , leaning with her elbow on a heavy illustrated Bible.
-          So… She obviously does not fast much – thought Katia, feeling slightly faint of hunger – “baggy eyes is a definite sign of unmeasured alcohol abuse. And would you look at her pose! She’s a whore!”
Katia felt it was a good chance to demonstrate a good example of Christian indulgence for human vices. All she had to do was treat the poor soul as equal and lead her to piety and devotion by her own example. However,  Katia was never able to conceal her feelings well enough. Her thoughts, though not always  articulated, involuntarily appeared in her eyes and facial expression. Her  feeling of superiority and contempt clearly showed as the young lady sneered and not bothering to change her pose despite Katia’s meaningful look.
-          Welcome, Your Lordship!  I’m Inna. – said the specimen.
-          Katia.
-          Hope you don’t mind the discomfort. However, you seem to be strong in spirit. A little asceticism  will do you good.
It was not a good start. The two ladies seemed to despise each other from the moment they met. In the following days they closely watched each other not even attempting to conceal their mutual dislike.
Every single day started at 5 am with morning prayers at church, followed by the obedience, which was either work in the garden or at the cowshed. At 11 am everyone gathered at the fratry for a quick breakfast. Then the obedience continued until 4pm. With a modest dinner at 4:30. At 7 pm everyone went to evening prayers . All the lights were to be off by 10 pm.

During the first two weeks Katia hadn’t missed a single service. She was exceptionally obedient and efficient. She  was getting more and more accustomed to the role of a faithful orthodox Christian. Her feeling of exclusiveness grew even more when one evening she was on her way to the garden when she saw puffs of smoke pouring from every crack of the terrifying toilet stall. As Katia came closer she saw Inna squatted in the middle of the noisome facility nervously pulling at a cigarette. Obviously Inna was unable to give up the habit, so she ingeniously hid her stash of cigarettes  at the place, where anyone stayed only as long as it was possible to keep one’s breath.
Smoking is strictly forbidden at any Russian monastery and is treated as evil addiction. Whoever was caught smoking was immediately turned out of the monastery in disgrace.
-          So you smoke as well? – Katia asked.
-          Does that offend your religious feelings?
-          You do know it’s forbidden?
-          Wanna go and tell?
-          You could at least try to give up.
-          Have you ever tried it yourself?  Ok, I’m going out to the village to watch TV with guys. And I need to take a shower before that.
-          You need a shower before you watch TV?
-          What if one of them hits on me and I’m not ready.
-          You’re insane. Don’t you know that lust is a sin? Besides, if you get caught they’ll kick you out of here.
-          That’s not your concern.
Inna returned after 3 am messed up and completely drunk. In the morning the room was filled with a strong smell of alcohol. Inna was hung over and inadequate. She rolled off her bed, crawled to the table and gulped down the water out of the jar with flowers.
That day Katia worked for the two of them. She had to lie to the mother-superior that Inna tripped on the slippery stairs,  turned her ankle and had to stay in all day. After breakfast Katia volunteered to peel potatoes for dinned and received a big plate of fried potatoes as a reward. She took it to Inna who stuffed it in her mouth with her hands and greedily swallowed forgetting  to chew.

Next morning the two girls were in the field grazing the cattle and eating their miserable breakfast, which consisted of a risky combination of milk and cucumbers.
-          Do you seriously think you belong here? – Katia suddenly asked.
-          Do I have a choice? I have nowhere to go and nothing to return to. My mother brought me here by force. She thought it’s better than to end up at the asylum. My husband died of overdose. He was a junkie. I was six months pregnant with twins when it happened . I thought I would at least have his children. They both died several hours after birth. I was totally destroyed and started drinking. Soon I was kicked out of the apartment. I called my sister and begged her to let me stay with her and her husband until I find a new place. You have to understand – I was lonely  and depressed. One day I slept with my sister’s husband and we were caught in the act. I had to move out and of course my sister wiped me from her memory. I started roaming from place to place. I had no job and no money. Mother sometimes brought me food. I degraded day by day. So one day my mother brought me here . For the first week all I did was cried. Then I got used to this place. After all – I have nothing to loose. I had a boyfriend though. But he is a baby – 7 years younger than me. It couldn’t be serious. I don’t love him. He was drafted into the army last year. Still has a whole year to serve. He writes  to me every week. Says that he’ll take me away and marry me. Idiot! I decided to spend the rest of my life here… repenting.
The conversation was interrupted by interaction of milk and cucumbers…

Sunday was the best day of the week. Katia and Inna were allowed to work only half a day and even to leave the monastery to go down to the river for a swim. Not only was it a chance to sunbathe but also a perfect opportunity to wash. Girls took swimsuits and towels and headed for the river. As they passed a local store Inna asked:
-Would you like a drink?
- What?
- It’s Sunday, isn’t it? Time to relax. Let’s get a bottle of vodka and have a little fun.
To her own surprise Katia suddenly replied:
-          OK. A little drink then.
This was not like her. Katia almost never drank. She was a professional swimmer and had a strict regime to follow.
On their way to the beach girls came across a local electrician, Sasha. He was a young short man with a golden tooth and suspiciously shifty eyes. He came to work for the season and his wife, in her attempt to keep him from cheating on her, made him bring along their four year old daughter.
-          Going to the beach? – he asked in his oily manner. “ And well prepared as far as I can see.  A liter of vodka is lethal for two young girls. Need help?”

In an hour the bottle was empty. Inna was paddling in the river and Katia was trying to resist the oncoming intoxication. The look of the horny Electrician disgusted her. Her mind was still surprisingly clear, but her body refused to obey her. She already felt scored , hairy hands undoing her shirt. She made an attempt to call Inna for help, but Inna was splashing in the water in drunken stupor.  Electrician lifted Katia with a jerk , dragged her off the beach, threw her in the nettle and started to unbuckle his belt.
Being raped right outside the nunnery walls, during an austere Christian exploit was too much for Katia. Gathering the remains of her willpower Katia gave electrician a violent kick. She was not a weakling, but she never imagined that she actually possessed such inhuman strength. Electrician was sent flying giving Katia time to call for help…
Girls returned to the nunnery  late in the evening.  Hung over, bruised and in a messed up shirt, Katia was unable to make it to her room. She tripped, fell on the floor and slept in the corridor until morning. 
The following week was torture. Katia’s  pious group mates set up a boycott. None of them spoke to her, she was not allowed to attend services. For some strange reason the cow stables had to be cleaned during dinner or breakfast, rotten last year potatoes had to be taken out of the basement during the only hours when the pilgrims were allowed to use the showers at the nuns house, grass had to be mown in the pouring rain, dishes in the kitchen had to be washed with powdered mustard instead of washing liquid, which made Katia’s hand itch and swell. Katia was outcast and decisively excluded from the steadfast and uncompromising Christian community.

Katia sat alone in the shabby train car. The odor of cow manure drove out all the passengers.  Katia was already neatly dressed, packed and ready to catch the 3:15 bus when mother-superior said she had final surprise for her. All the manure from the cow stables had to  be taken out into the garden with the help of a shovel and a cart. There was no time to wash or to change. If Katia didn’t make it to the bus, she’d be stuck in the damn place for another day.  She grabbed the cart and  shovel and ran for the stable.
-“So, the higher you rise the harder you fall. I needed this lesson” – Katia thought .
She never felt happier to be going home.