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by zaril
Rated: E · Poetry · Entertainment · #1696098
Some of the laws my Grandmother taught me.
God rest her soul, My Grandmother was like many grandmothers of her generation.  She loved her family especially her children and grandchildren.  She earnestly tried to encourage us all to be righteous, live in peace and express and expect joy in our lives.  One of the many things she taught us, very vigorously was what we could and could not do on the church grounds.  She expressed to us that the Church was of God and for God. And we were abundantly blessed and privileged to be there. One of my favorite quotations of hers was, “Don’t let me catch you acting up on Church Grounds!”  ‘Acting up’ was violating one or more of her laws.  So these are some of the many things my Grandmother taught us that we were absolutely not to do on the sacred Church Grounds:

Thou shalt not sin
Thou shalt not chew gum
Thou shalt not spit
Thou shalt not spit gum
Thou shalt not speak loudly
Thou shalt not yell
Thou shalt not scream
Thou shalt not sing
Thou shalt not play music
Thou shalt not play
Thou shalt not cry
Thou shalt not stomp
Thou shalt not throw tantrums of any kind
Thou shalt not roll thine eyes
Thou shalt not purse thine lips
Thou shalt not pick thine nose

There are many, many more of these laws but these are the main ones.  And if these laws are followed to the letter we’ll all be safe. (I guess gossiping was optional, at least it seems to be in my church.)
I love you Grandma.
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