Salvation

When I was a child I could quote scripture as if I wrote it
Until the words became nothing but muscle memory beating out of my throat
And I forgot what the words meant
I traded my identity for religion
Believing I reserved myself a spot in heaven next door to God
I rode this religion until one day I found these empty words couldn’t fix me
And my muscle memory couldn’t help me find myself
So I turned finding salvation into a passion
Making it the oxygen in my lungs, the blood in my veins
My heart beat as if it alone could break the ribcage from the inside out
And I screamed from the bottom of my stomach
Praying to God or yelling at stars
At times they both felt like reminiscent lights that burned out long ago
But took their time to pierce through the black glass of the sky
So I swallow pride like it was prescribed to me
And search through gold rimmed pages
Hoping I left my innocence in there like a bookmark
To remind me what words will help me find myself
When my mirror isn’t being reflective of light
But my bookmark got lost in the pages or fell out all together
So I have to start from scratch
Chasing after salvation in broken mirrors and condensed smoke
To find my book mark turned to ashes
The night I thought love could be boiled down to a chance encounter and hazy dreams
I turned my mind to these dreams and believed them to be a prophet’s tongue
So I burned my bookmark and lost my place
And now the stars have betrayed me but I hear a voice say “I can’t burnout”
Hoping its God I bruise my knees on the ground
And pray that my soul forgets about gravity
‘cause my shoulders can’t hold what I put on them
And my spine is starting to crack
So I pray for salvation
And the only weight I felt pushed me to the voice
Through the black glass of the sky into empty space
I heard the voice destroy gravity
With poetry so powerful it could make Milton weep
And through the peaceful emptiness I heard a voice say
“Here is your salvation”