WashBack

This is all too much
Everyday I live to die for people who will never know me
Everyday I strive and try for people who don't give a damn
Everyday I wonder why I’m even here
Stupid choices
What am I doing here?
This is not me.
Instability surrounds me.
Hatred claws at me.
What did I do?
Who do they think they are?
They obviously don't know
What will happen next
I swear I will leave this Hell
And I will leave it on top.
They will stare and wonder
How I made it out alive
And I?
Will laugh.
Laugh in the faces of all the people who've tried to hold me back.
I will be better.
I won't fail.
I won't take anymore.
I am nobody's charity.
Nobody’s little lap dog.
Sitting, waiting, living to obey.
I will rise to the ranks of the best.
The system is twisted.
The leaders vindictive.
The followers blind to the fate they signed for.
Hell
All of this is Hell.
Everyday I walk through staring at the faces of those "above" me.
Looking for some sort of role model.
And there is no one.
Cut throat.
Would kill their own friend to make it.
It’s all an illusion.
This whole thing
One big joke.
You’ve gotta be kidding me.
Leave the strong behind.
Break them
Break them
Beat them down until they only thing they want is
A simple chance
To be off the ground.
But they will have none.
They are too much.
What the i done?
This backward world.
Failure, death, hate, sickness
Mentally, physicaly, emotionaly, spiritualy
Beaten
Beaten
Until i can barely get up.
Never ending cycle
Of pain and destruction.
I just want to make it...
But I fear I never will...
I filled my head with silly fantasies
Lies
All they tell me are lies.
All I want is release.
What's the point in trying?
I need to
Let go
Just let it go.
I want to.
You can't make me fail.
I will make it.
Crawling on knees rubbed raw from miles and miles of desolate travel
I can do this
I want to scream
But my voice is quickly snatched away.
And it all continues.
Try again, all my strength
To lift myself from the ground.
Kicked in the ribs
Back on my face again.
Feebly trying to make a move in this twisted game.
What am I supposed to do??
There is nothing
I can do this.
I will do this.
I can make it.
I try and convince myself yet again
If only I knew where the next step was...
Crawling blindly to a fate I know nothing of.