The Secret Diaries of Samuel B. Pepys

Prologue and Chapter one and link to the ongoing tale...

Summary: Based on my other story web site, Bess is a Vampire Slayer.
However, although the souls of Buffy and William, her lost love from
the Buffy series, are present, things are switched a bit.


read more and get more background on Anne/Sam/Cicely/Buffy and her
William/Bess at http://www.angelfire.com/zine2/buffyrebecca/sdsp1.html


"The Secret Diaries of Samuel B. Pepys..."


Prologue and Part the First


Summary: In another past life of Buffy and William...A desperate-to-
keep-the-case of Anne/Cicely/Buffy- and-William vengeance demon
Anyanka tries to redirect their curse using a unique strategem...With
interesting results suggesting that a certain famed 17th century
diarist and his lady had more going on than even his famed daily diary
let us know...


Note: The best way to know Mr. Pepys is through his magnificent nine
year daily Diary...Which is now available on-line on a day-to-day
basis at http://pepysdiary.com/ courtesy of the wonderful Phil
Gyford.


I would also recommend "The Unequaled Self", a new biography by Claire
Tomlin...Just terrific and fills in the gaps the diary leaves...


Hey, no one said Buffy always had to be the Slayer in her past lives
with William...


Or a her...


(It might help if you read my tale "Original Sin"...A sort of
prequel...And my Cicelyverse page notes)


Special disclaimer: This story is a work of fiction and does not
purport to be in any way a biography of the historical Samuel Pepys...
(Though dammit, I love the philandering, charming, intrepid, self-
centered, loyal, hard-headed, romantic, money-grubbing, loving and
lovable, scheming, dutiful lil' 17th century Clerk of the Acts and
Secretary of the Admiralty...One of history's greatest writer-
chroniclers...)


Prologue:


The misty reaches of the bleak realm of the Lord of Vengeance,
D'Hoffryn...


"Two hundred years?!..." the Lord of all things vengeful glared from
his throne at the lovely, if rather anxious-looking, human face of his
likely to soon be less than chief demon, Anyanka...Who scrunched down
a bit under his wrathful glare...


Various imps and demons hurriedly seeking other places to be on
suddenly important business...


Ummn...D-H...


"I'm to wait for my Slayer-vengeance demon for two hundred years?!..."


Gee...A blink in Eternity's eye...Anyanka, in 17th century dress and
Anya human form...Thought...What's he so upset for...?


"And with no guarantee the Slayer and her mate will be destroyed in
1880!...Correct?!..."


Oh...Right...The lack of a sure thing...Well, hey...In life...she
thought...


"Well?!..."


"No...Sir...I can't guarantee it...But there's a very good chance...If
all goes well..."


"If...?!!" All the vengeance lord's famed congeniality of manner had,
for the moment, flown the coop...


"Well, D-H..." A hard glare...Ummn... "My Lord D'Hoffryn...It's gonna
be voluntary...She's gotta ask for it...Those are the rules and you
did make them..."


Under duress when the PTBs were gonna kick your butt unless you
cooperated...she did not say...


"After all, D-H..." she began... Don't, Anyanka...he glared...


Don't try and dodge by claiming it was the wisher, Mr. Jonson's
fault...Your job is supposed to be to wrest our victories out of the
foolish little nasty wishes our idiot clients make...


"I did my best, D-H...Sir..." And as a fan of Mr. WS' work, you
yourself didn't want the wish to go into effect during Mr. and Mrs.
Shakespeare's lifetimes...she again did not say...


"Well...Obviously it was not 'best' enough..." the vengeance lord
groused...


"Couldn't you have found a faster mechanism?..." he shook his nobly
horned head...Sighed... "Anyanka...Giving these two, the Slayer and
her mate two hundred years to prepare for us in Heaven..."


"They won't be in Heaven for long, D-H..." A silky voice now is
heard...D'Hoffryn looking out over the ranks...Haly?...


"Halfreck...?"


"Yes, sir.."Haly beams... "Right here, sir..."


Hey, Anyanka...she waves...Haly...Anyanka nods a bit...A slight
suspicion forming in her heart...


"What's this about the Slayer and her significant other?..." D-H
interrupts...


"Oh...They're about to return to Earth..."


"What!?...Anyanka?!..."


Ummn...Was just about to mention that...Sir...she nodded feebly...


"They're about to be reborn?!...Find each other again?!!..."


What's the big deal...she thought, rather peeved...


They've been reborn nearly a dozen times already...And they always
hook up eventually...


"They're soulmates, D-H...It's unavoidable that they'll find each
other once reborn..." she quietly noted... "Besides...I have a plan to
turn this rebirth to our advantage..."


One I just came up with this very second...she did not say...Eyeing
Halfreck carefully...Who gave a serene glance back...


"Anyanka..." D-H frowned..."Anyanka...This better be good...Cause if
you screw this up...I may just decide it's time to hand things over to
Halfreck on this one..."


Haly beaming serenely off to D-H's side...


"She is after all...A distant relative of our target..."


Anyanka glared...


"I won't fail...I'll have her soul in our camp within...Oh,
say...Twenty, twenty-five years..."


Hmmn...A cold glance from the Vengeance Lord...


"D-H, they gotta grow up, find each other, get married..."


True enough, he sighed...


"And with the wrench I'm gonna throw in their works..." Anyanka
beamed... "The Slayer's soul will be banging on our door two centuries
ahead of schedule...Demanding justice for what Fate and certain Evil
ones have done..."


Hmmn...D-H frowned...I dunno...


"Very well...But if you fail, Anyanka..."


An eagerly hopeful Haly fading back slightly...But alls not lost...


And she has faith in true love...


Heh, heh, heh...


***


        Samuel                and Elisabeth Pepys...
Part I...


Restoration London...1667....


"Where is he?!..." a fuming voice with slight French accent...The two
maids tending dinner in the family kitchen of the home of Samuel B.
and Elisabeth Pepys eye each other...


"At it again, is he?..." one hisses...Shh...As a furious and
ravishingly beautiful Elisabeth bursts into the room...Nearly as young
as the two young maids...


"Where is Mr. Pepys?!...He promised to be home for dinner!!...He
specifically asked for...Jane?..." she turned to the older of the two
maids... "Did Mr. Pepys send a note from his office?...Did anyone
come...?"


No, mum...Jane shook her head... "Nobody's come...The master must out
and about his..." she eyes the younger maid... "Business..."


"I understand things is very busy round Whitehall these days..." she
added innocently...


Elisabeth gives a cold stare...Yes...?


"What was the navy hearin's and all..." Jane notes...More kindly...
"I'm sure he just got too busy to come...The King himself and the Duke
relying on him so much these days, ma'am..."


Hmmn...Elisabeth torn between a sudden half-beam and a grimly jealous
glare...


"Well, Monsieur might have the gentlemanly kindness to inform us when
he can't come home at dinner...One he specifically ordered..."


Yes, miss...Jane nodded...Curtsying slightly as did the other girl,
rather more badly...


"Nell!..." Elisabeth stamps, striking her on the arm... "You silly
girl!...You must learn to behave properly in this house!...This is the
proper way..." she curtsies... "See the girl learns how to act in this
house, Jane!..." she stalks off...Pausing, she turns back to them...


Oh...Since Mr. Pepys has denied us his company...I shall be going
out...Briefly...


"Jane...You shall accompany me...Make yourself ready...And you,
girl..." a glare at Nell... "Be minding your manners or by the Mass
and God above!...I swear!..."


"Miss...?" Jane eyes her mistress... "The master don't like when you
swear, miss...He said I was to remind yous of it..."


"By the Lord's Goddamn Mass!!...Mon Dieu!!!..." Elisabeth whirls
round, marches out of the kitchen, slamming a door behind
her...Something hard clattering to the floor from her apron pocket as
she does so...Jane nervously glancing at the stake dropped...Quickly
but unobtrusively moving to conceal and shove it away from view by her
clueless coworker...


Not that Nell ain't a good sort and all...Just some things about the
Pepys...Mistress and Master...Are best left secret...


"Well..." Nell rubs her chin... "Don't think I much mind missing this
trip...Say?..." her voice drops to a conspiratorial whisper... "You
think she'll be leaving you alone again while she goes off...?"


"To see her parents...That Frenchie dad and mum of hers...And that
Balty, her brother...She don't like to have me come and see em...Guess
she don't like anyone knowing how poor they is..."


She says she visits em...Nell gives a solemnly suscipious look... "But
if you never see who she goes in to...Who's to say...?"


I hear she's a Papist...Goes to see a priest...the girl notes
solemnly...Or some feller...


Jane slaps her comrade...Reasonably hard enough to suggest it is not
an act of friendly restraint...


"Here now, girl...Mind your own place and leave the Mistress to
hers...Ask no questions and no lies'll be told ya, I says...She's a
good lady, the Mistress...Just a bit unhappy these days...So let her
be and keep your mouth shut...Or as I am no Papist, you'll be out on
the street with a good hiding..."


Hmphf...Nell waves a hand... "I still think it's wrong of her to give
poor Mr. Pepys such a hard time when she's going galavanting off as
she feels like it...A wife should know to keep her place by the house
my mum always says...Anything else...The ways of Satan..."


"Be quiet!..." a sharp slap... "Look sharp and mind your tongue, you
good-for-nought!...Or the Mistress and Master might just find out who
left the Master's shoes out on the front porch all the other night..."
Jane turns and heads off to prepare for the afternoon's journey...


"Still say it's a crime the way she lays into poor Mr. Pepys...And him
so nice and all..." Nell whispers to the empty room... "Poor soul...He
was so sweet the other night when I combed his hair..."


Uh-huh...Jane, hearing from the doorway, eyes her...


Cut to shot of a back room of the King's Flagon Pub...Near
Whitehall...But definitely not a place in use for business purposes...


At least...Not business purposes befitting the esteemed Clerk of the
Acts of the Royal Navy...


***


(Music begins...Opening bars of "L-O-V-E")


Play


"Now Frank, my dear..."


"Mr. Pepys..." Young Frances the barmaid...Wife to the pub
owner...Looks up at the eminent Clerk of the Acts of the Royal Navy,
Mr. Samuel B. Pepys... "I mustn't...Stay...If me husband..."


The door bursts open...Michaels...The owner...And husband...A short
and dark but tough-looking Bob Hoskinsish type...Grimly eyes his
wife...Then, on top of her, his favorite client...


Favorite and most generous client...


Favorite, generous, and somewhat dishelved client...


Favorite, generous, somewhat dishelved client with hand well down said
owner's wife, Frances' ample cleveage...


Pepys looks at Michaels' grimly staring face...


Frances, half-bent over a chair likewise looks up at her husband's
face...Trying a sweet smile...Lo, Michaels...


"Michaels...Ah..."


"Mr. Pepys..." A curt nod...


"I..."


"I take it...Sir...That my request to be given the remainder of the
Navy's unused ration of bread for this year stored at Deptford...At
the price I offered...Is to be accepted?.." Michaels eyes Pepys
coolly...


Pepys blinks...Then, rather ludicrously, stiffens a bit...Clearly
annoyed by the hint that he is a man potentially subject to
blackmail...


The very idea...


"Michaels...I have told you that the matter is in the hands of the
Admiralty board...I can do no..."


Michaels eloquently eyes Frances...Now pulling her clothes back up
into a more respectable state...


"Oh, do put in a good word for us...Mr. Pepys..." Frances eagerly adds
her bit for the family business... "It would make us...And Mr.
Michaels and I would be ever so grateful...Ready to do you any
kindness we could in return...Right, Maxwell?..."


Aye...Michaels nods coolly...Arms folded...


Hmmn?...Any...Kindness...? Pepys eyes him, then Frances...


("L is for the way you...Look at me...")


Frances makes cows eyes at Pepys...Michaels simply stares...


("O is for the only...One I see...")


***


Pepys is seen leaving the tavern, looking...Rather content...


("V is very, very...Extraordinary...)


Such a nice man and so learned...Ah, me...Frances sighs to
Michaels...Who stares at her as she dresses...


"Miserable little stuck-up tailor's son that what he is..." Michaels
grouses...


"And if it weren't for his cousin, Lord Sandwich..."


Now, Maxwell...Frances gives him a fondly chiding look...


(E is even more than any one that you adore...And...")


Pepys pausing by several stalls to cheerfully greet the sellers and
pick up a bit of gossip and news as he stolls happily alone...His
pausing at some extended by the fact that the sellers are...Mostly
ladies...


("Love is all that I can...Give to you...


Love is more than just a...Game for two...


Two in love can make it...Take my heart and please don't break it...


Love was made for you and me...")


read more?  http://www.angelfire.com/zine2/buffyrebecca/sdsp1.html