by Lea Rachel
ways to eliminate excuses to make what you want to do a reality
| If you ask people what stops them from doing something, a good number of them will say fear. |
And while fear is a good thing because it keeps us from harm and danger, it can also be a bad thing because it stops us from trying something new as well.
If we let fear stop us, we will never start a new relationship, discover a new hobby, or do something new. Notice the key word here is new. If we don’t try new things, we tend to get stuck and in a rut. And speaking from experience being stuck in a rut gets you left behind and depressed.
But this isn’t so much about fear as it is about excuses that stop us from overcoming those fears. When we are afraid of something, we make excuses to not do something. For example when I first wrote this, writing was my biggest fear.
Well, not writing, I wrote all the time growing up. But showing my writings to others. When I wrote, I wrote for myself, so I could escape my life and transport myself to made-up worlds.
Ones I could control. And growing up, my writing was the only thing I could control And as every inventor can relate I wanted to protect my new creation..
Now, as an adult, I began learning that fear and excuses can stop me from doing all sorts of things; from writing to relationships. So to see just what was stopping me and if it was a true excuse - something that was truly impossible or something that I told myself was impossible.
The following is a list of excuses I have used in the past to NOT do something because fear and excuses stopped me. Maybe you can relate to a few as well.
1 Afraid of failure
2 Too old to start writing
3 No skill in chosen field
4 I’m disabled
5 Others have more experience
6 No one likes me /knows who I am
And while these are just a few of the excuses I could write down, the bottom line was if I wanted my life to be a success in any area- besides writing, I had to decide if I was going to push out of my comfort zone.
So, after much soul searching and journal writing, I came up with three choices:
1)throw the list away and not look back. Stay where I was and not complain
2) throw the excuses away and say, “Nothing is going to stop me from doing what I
3) make a list that knocks down every single excuse you have for not doing something.
If you chose number one the rest of the article won’t matter so don’t bother reading on. But- if you chose two or three read on...
For instance, if you want to be a writer, but the fear of rejection scares you to death, the first thing you could learn is to have a tougher skin.
Remember rejection is not personal, it's business. Therefore, the first thing you must do is develop a tough skin. The one thing that I always remember when I get down about my writing is that Stephen King kept every single rejection letter. ( You can read more from his book ‘On Writing’) Now if he can continue writing and submitting for publication so can I. He wouldn’t be a great writer if he quit. ( These opinions of course are my own.lol)
So what I did was write at the top of a piece of paper my goal.
Goal: “Be a writer” Then I continued to write the steps as follows
Second : write down steps it will take to accomplish that goal. How long it might take and if more education is something you are going to need to accomplish this goal.
Things to make me a better writer is to go back to school and learn the fundamentals of writing. Now whether that's traditional school or online is up to you. For that you need to look at the timeline for how long it will take, as well as cost. Or if cost is a factor, look at online resources. There are plenty of websites that can help writers.
Third is age and fear of being too old to accomplish something. The solution to that is research. Find others who are in the field you are interested in and write them down. Discover who they are, how they got started, and if it helps at what age they began. Were they just starting out, or had they been in this field a while and were seeking additional training? Once you have three or four names you can eliminate number two from your list.
Fourth is the excuse of being disabled or not physically able to accomplish something. This was my personal excuse because when I felt depressed I used that as an excuse. However, to eliminate that excuse I did some more research and found others who did not let their disability stop them. I was not only surprised but inspired as well.
Fifth and six can go together and they are: ‘others have more experience than I do, and 'no one likes or knows me.' For the fifth one I went back to the first solution - go back to school and learn that trade inside and out.
And remembering no one knew who these famous people were when they first began either. But with their determination and persistence to make their dream or goal a reality we know who they are. So that excuse can be eliminated as well.
Finally, Remember no matter where you are in life or what you want to do, there is always someone who has taken the steps before you, (as well as those who will follow after you) who are showing you the way. All you must do is take it one step at a time and not quit!
Good luck to you