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Rated: ASR · Poetry · Comedy · #2260632
Winner. It was always left long after Halloween, even after the saltwater taffy.
The Curse of the Candy Corn
(To the tune of "The Unicorn")

Every year about October, it would come Halloween
And there was more kinds of candies than you’ve ever seen.
We’d fill our bags and pillow sacks but to our great scorn,
The ugliest of all was that candy corn.

         Oh, gimme those little wax bottles of Nik-L-Lips
         Necco Candy Wafers and potato chips
         Pop Rocks ‘n’ Tootsie Rolls but sure as yer born,
         Don’t you gimme no candy corn.

Now I put on my costume, I went as Batman
I’m out collecting candy just as fast as I can
I got candy bars and licorice and oh, I’m so forlorn
I still got candy corn.

         O, gimme them boxes of Nerds, a jawbreaker or two
         Some salt water taffy and some Milk Duds too
         Some Smarties or some Junior Mints but I gotta warn
         Don’t you gimme no candy corn.

Now, Halloween’s over and my stash is running low
I’ve eaten all the good stuff and you just gotta know
There’s only one thing left and it’s kind of sugar porn--
Nothing but candy corn.

         Oh, gimme some peanut brittle, gummy worms or Swedish fish
         Some red candy apples, or anything delish.
         Only one thing in my bag will cause me to mourn:
         Oh, that blasted candy corn.

Now every Halloween in my long memory
Followed in the same common pattern, you see
Every year my friends and I we found this the norm:
No one ever ate the candy corn.

There'd be another chorus, but the prompt is to end with the bolded line.
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