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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2278383-Alien-Conversation
Rated: E · Fiction · Contest Entry · #2278383
Contest entry - August Dialog

"Pass the coffee again, Madge, please?"

"That's your ninth cup tonight, Jay."

"What else can we do? It's not like we are on the southern border. Here the only traffic we get is from a Canadian trying to sneak back. Usually a draft dodger from the 1970s."

"Hey Jay, look at that one, the first one we've seen since our shift started. What is he wearing?"

"Looks like a wet suit? Think he came over the falls?"

"Hey buddy, do you have a passport or identification?"

"redael ruoy em ekat."

"Jay, one of those draft dodgers who spent the last five decades smoking that wacky to-backy!"

"Buddy, do you speak English?"

"redael ruoy em ekat."

"What? Madge, you better call this one in. Maybe one for the looney bin."

"redael ruoy em ekat."

"Hey Jay, I think he is talking backward, my kids do that sometimes as a way to communicate without adults to interpret them."

"redael ruoy em ekat."

"Great Madge, do you understand him? I need more coffee anyway.

"redael ruoy em ekat."

"I can try Jay. Can you talk slower?"

"redael ruoy em ekat."

"Duck Madge he just pulled a funky gun from his ear?"

"It's okay Jay, I don't think it's a gun. I think it is a translator like they had on Star Trek."

"Do you have a passport or identification?"

"Take me to your leader."

"Madge, who is our leader?"

"Don kooo. President Biden?"

"Take me to your leader."

"I would like to do that but Madge and me, well we are just border agents and we have dozens of leaders. Can you be more specific?

"Take me to your leader."

"Jay, I don't think he is an illegal alien, I think he an alien from another planet?

"Madge, well he is not too bright if he landed here. Don't think it's an invasion."

"Take me to your leader."

"Jay here comes another one,"

"Take us to your leader."

"I think they want to talk to my ex-wife; she thinks she rules the world."

"Take us to your leader,"

"What do we do Jay?"

"Heck if I know. Wait the second one has an I IPhone I think?"

"Jay, maybe I can use his phone and program 1600 Pennsylvania Ave in his Google maps for him?"

"Take us to your leader."

"Give it a try Madge!"

"I think it's working. This one seems to understand."

"Your leader - is at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave?"

"Well, he thinks he is our leader, but who knows. He may be able to help you both. Here look at my phone, I have a picture of him."

"No, he is not your leader, your leader is tall and has a dark beard."

"Madge, I think he is talking about Abe Lincoln?"

"I will program Ford's theater into his phone as well. Look is this the leader you seek?"

"Yes. Thank you. We will go to visit him now."

"Jay they just disappeared!"

"Madge, can you pass the coffee?"



WORDS 498













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