I have a strong urge to move to Iceland. Forget I have a life here.
| What is it like to feel free?|
I long for the way it feels. Untethering my soul.
The world I have isn't bad, isn't unfair. I have a lot to be grateful for. But it'll never be what I want.
For trees. For mountains. For roots. For home.
And no, not the place I live and raise a family. The place where my spirit connects with my surroundings.
I cry dreaming of that place.
The wholeness of just standing, my bare feet in the cool moss.
I am alone.
I am bound to the earth.
I want to feel that flow.
I want to scream that release to the stony peaks above me. To the waterfalls and thick trees below me.
The stars I would watch, laying on a littered ground of leaves and pine needles.
That breath that no one is around to hear. My breath.
Someone just take me home.
So I can cry.
So I can belong.
So I can live. Actually live.
This is the freedom I crave.
I ache for, I hate myself for.
That outstretched hand and a fleeting grasp at something so far.
....so far out of reach.
I guess I'll just have to close my eyes,
For extended periods of time.