A diary of Alissa. Alone, deny, confused.
| In my class there are four groups, the popular blonds, the one who thinks their popular but isn't really, the Asians and the leftovers. It's hard to be a newcomer stuck in the middle of this chaos, but there I am, on my first day of school.|
I never wanted to come to a place full of smartasses who looks down on anyone who disobeys even the stupidest rules; snobby people who loves to correct people just so they seem intelligent; people with the same personality and the worst of all, the "labelers". You meet them, leaves a bad impression and your whole class refuses to speak to you.
Okay look, before I knew what the people here were like, I still, didn't want to go. The reason was simple. It's an all-girls school. I'm not gay. But I'm not saying anything like "Ohh all girls schools are full of gays" no, that's not what I mean. What I'm trying to say is I just don't feel comfortable with just girls. I don't have anything against the LGBTQ community it's just that I am perfectly fine with being straight, I don't wanna turn gay, that's all. Or that's what I thought.
You see, before I was forced to move schools, I had just had my first boyfriend. I loved him, well, I think I did. We were in the same class, and everything just came together like we were puzzle pieces from the same puzzle. At that time, I would have done everything to keep it that way, but accidents do happen. A sentence spilled out my mouth without going through my brain first, my parents found out, they were furious.
That's kinda how I ended up here, in this school. I. HATE.
But now I'm here, stuck, because instead of being a normal day student, I board. It's practically a jail cell without bars! I'm here all the time. Every single day AND night. No going outside, no good Wi-Fi, no good food. How much worse can it possibly get.
Seems like I'm on a slide just going down and down and down, no way to stop before I hit rock bottom, no way of backing out, no way of escaping. Just endless darkness waiting for me, but its not all bad, there is one single ray of light keeping me together.
Margarite. Her sister's my best friend so I got to know her a little. She's two years older than me, insanely smart and says the sweetest, funniest things. She's pretty and talented and sporty. Confident, brave, and loyal. Sometimes I wish that I was in the same year as her or she's in my year so I could be HER friend and not just her SISTER'S best friend. There're so many things I want to talk to her about, so many questions I want to ask, but she has her friends and sadly, I'm not one of them.
Now this is the point where I became soo confused and started to deny the fact that I had developed a crush on Margarite. But I couldn't, I just couldn't. Margarite is too perfect to not be liked. But I on the other hand was the furthest from perfection.