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Rated: ASR · Fiction · Comedy · #2321547
Yeah, I accept it's not good, it's been a while since i wrote this, so yeah.

This story is a work of fiction and does not relate to any real life events. The characters written in this story are real only if you are delusional and fantasize about fictional men.

Also, I wrote this story a while ago, so it may not be as pleasing to your... whatever you read with, hehe.


"one hundred and twenty nine, one hundred and thirty. This is getting out of hand, and the authorities are not even taking any firm step against this! We need Detective X, now!" Sheriff David ordered his assistant. The assistant swiftly heeded to his order and called Detective X right away.

X was in the police department conversing with Sheriff David about the crimes. "As you can see here, Detective X, this is the list, one hundred and thirty cases have been filed by now, all of them with almost identical description, money theft, jewelries, no footprints or any sign found. Our officers have failed us time and time again, you are our only hope." Detective X listened to Sheriff, at first he was silent and then after a few seconds, said, "So, Sheriff, after one hundred and thirty cases being filed, you finally remembered me, huh?" "No, Detective X, it's not like that." Explained Sheriff.

"Look at you! Haha, I was just joking, Sheriff, do detectives not have the right to be playful sometimes? Anyway, when was the last case filed, and from whom?" X inquired.

"Last case was filed by John Appleseed, at 11 am yesterday, he stated that he was out for a business tour and when he came back, he saw that his gold bars and three thousand dollars which he had put in a safe locker, were stolen." Said Sheriff.

"Take me to his house." X got up from his chair and left the department, then entered Sheriff's car.

At John Appleseed's house, X met him. "Mr. Appleseed, nice to meet you, I'm Detective X and I have been informed by Sheriff David that your safe lock has been robbed. I am here to investigate and take alibis from you." John let him inside his house.

X investigated the house for a while and remarked to John, "what would you rate his intelligence out of ten, Mr. Appleseed?"

"An eight, perhaps, he made sure to not leave any footsteps or traces."

X chuckled, "well, Mr. Appleseed, if you may bother to ask me, I would say two. You see this?" He pointed to the cleaner part of the floor perpendicular to the window, "only this small portion of the floor he cleaned, although he did manage to clean up his footsteps, he failed to clean the traces."

X looked out the window and saw a road that faced the window. X gazed at the road, just then a street sweeper intervened. Just when he was about to sweep the road, X quickly called out to the sweeper, "Hey! Don't clean it, there's evidence." The sweeper paused for a moment, then looked at X, showed affirmation and put his broom back in the bucket.

As he jumped out of the window, X approached the road where two parallel lines with a three inch gap in between signaled in X's mind a probability of a four wheeler passing by the road, most likely an SUV.

X cautiously started to follow the tracks. Passing by highways, unfinished roads, woods, he eventually found the tracks ending at a muddy field. There he found a midget who was contemplating tree branches.

In hopes of a witness, X approached the man. He asked him if he had seen an SUV pass by. The man silently stared at him for a good few seconds and then said, "yes."
"Do you know where it went?" X inquired.

"Yes." The midget remarked.

"Then, will you tell me about it?" He asked the midget again, hiding his anger under his skin.
"Yes. But first I will have to get your name and..." the man turned a mischievous smile and continued, "20 bucks."

"Are you trading help?" X scolded him.

"This is business, Mr." Said the man.

X rolled his eyes and gave him 20 bucks.

"Your name, Mr." The man reminded X.

"Detective X." X remarked.

"Alright, Detective Sex-"

"HEY!" X shouted. "Detective X!"

The man jumped. "Alright alright, Detective X, isn't it?" Then gave him a note that said, "Water, water, everywhere, And all the boards did sink; Water, water, everywhere, Nor any drop to drink."

X got mad. He raged at the man, "what is it, if I may ask you? You gave me a note, and you've written a poem on it, and you didn't even write it right! You charged me 20 bucks for this stupid thing?"

The man told X to stop shouting, "I suppose you're a Detective, and I believe you should be able to get the clue. Remember Mr. Detective se- X, Detective X, tiny droplets lead to an ocean."

X's reaction was a gallimaufry of bewilderment and wince when he left the field and on the road that intersected the muddy field, he found tiny droplets making a path on the way.

X got in his car and chased the droplets, eager to uncover the mystery. The droplets seemed to meander on the way and then his tire hit a mud puddle which made the car jump and lurch, but he managed to get control over it again. When he finally got himself out of the dirty situation, he noticed that there were four parallel tracks as a set of two indicating the passing-by of a truck. The droplets were still seen in between the tracks. X supposed, perhaps, a water truck could be a great match and kept following it until he finally saw it.

The shelter was made of stripped wooden logs and planks, and just in the face of it was the truck he was looking for.

X took cover behind the truck and made sure to not be seen by the gang members. When he was reassured about the absence of danger, he snuck up the ladder behind the truck and reached the top where he removed the lid on the top and was met by a layer of wooden planks on the top.

One by one, he took out all the planks and now could see all the stolen properties floating on the water.

X took them all out, slid them in the trunk of his car and then put the planks in again in hopes to hide his theft, but to his surprise, the planks sank and a loud alarm rang. He heard from afar, "that bastard's here!"

X quickly climbed down the ladders and took out his revolver, and pointed it towards a gang member. But they were seven for one, pointing their rifles right on his head. X surrendered, raising his hands up, and said, "okay, okay, alright, I'll give you my gun, don't kill me!"

He threw his gun at one of the members and then chuckled in silence. The leader got enraged and asked, "what are you laughing at, huh?"

X continued his laughter and said to him, "take a look behind, I had already called backup, they're now right at your back, and one of them is pointing towards you, leader." And gave them a mischievous smile.

The leader quickly grabbed the muzzle and looked behind just to find out that it was a branch hanging on the tree. And while they were all looking behind... Well, we all know what happened.
They looked back and found that X had fled away. They moved their eyes back and forth and saw him taking their pictures with their guns in hands. X laughed at them and mocked, "goodluck breaking out, losers!" And fled away, dodging the bullets.

The members were then arrested for theft, illegal trading and threatening with weapons.

X was in the court when the criminals were being sentenced to forty years in prison, that sent a sense of satisfaction in his heart, another case solved because of his precise understanding, a vision like eagle and quick thinking.

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