Pearls of Wisdom

PEARLS OF WISDOM

It was as I turned that I heard the first sound. I closed my eyes tightly in an effort to control the rising panic and eradicate a host of bad memories. The noise accelerated, echoing in my brain; I wanted to scream, run, or both, but there was no escape.

         Taking deep breaths failed to regulate my erratic, racing heartbeat or prevent the unwelcome film of sweat rapidly forming on my brow. Fumbling in my bag for a handkerchief I tried to mentally block out the sound but failed. My trembling hands jerked involuntarily; my bag fell to the floor with a heavy clatter, scattering its contents.

         “Are you all right, Miss?” A male voice enquired as I scrabbled on my hands and knees in an attempt to retrieve my belongings and my composure. I opened my parched mouth to speak but nothing came out; convincing me I‘d lost the ability to speak in any kind of coherent, recognisable language. Numbness gripped me as I stared up at the stranger from my kneeling position, paralysed with fear and embarrassment. The sound had stopped temporarily and in the ensuing silence I felt certain all eyes were on me and all ears tuned to the frightened little sobs now escaping uncontrollably from my shivering lips, reminiscent of an abandoned kitten stranded in darkness to fend for itself.

         The stranger turned away, wiping his lower jaw with a crumpled tissue but it was too late. I’d already witnessed the two rivulets of scarlet trickling slowly from either side of his mouth. Cold fear enveloped me in its icy grip.

         “Here, let me help you,” the stranger continued as he restored the paraphernalia to my bag and helped me to stand. “God, you look awful.” He lowered me into a nearby seat, patting my hand reassuringly. “Don’t worry; it will all be over soon.” He sauntered away, my terror obviously the least of his concerns.

         My wristwatch confirmed only several minutes had passed since the start of this ordeal yet I felt I’d been here for eternity; trapped in an anxiety-ridden time warp. I shouldn’t have come; the invitation could have been ignored quite easily, no one would have noticed. But I’d known for a long time that one way or another I would eventually be forced to capitulate. Damned if you do and damned if you don’t.

         The sound resumed; louder, closer, more menacing, assaulting every raw nerve in my body; sharp as a razor’s edge. I opened a magazine but concentration had deserted me; the printed words swam in front of my eyes like newly hatched tadpoles and made no sense. There was nothing but the noise; people, furnishings, even the walls faded into oblivion. Feeling the colour drain completely from my face I lowered my eyes to the floor but it rose to meet me before I could focus. Blurred images preceded blackness, then nothing.

         A vague feeling of being transported flitted through my memory on gaining consciousness. An unfamiliar, masked face slowly took shape through the haze as I tried to order my jumbled thoughts and familiarise myself with the strange surroundings. The room was cold and clinical, housing only threatening, metal weapons and the enemy. A sickly, sweet smile met my terrified eyes from behind the disguise. My trembling legs could offer no support and my petrified state offered no resistance as I heard those old familiar words.

“Open wide, please.”