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Rated: 18+ · Book · Comedy · #2312723
The Guinea Pig Files. Tales of Ralph, Toby and Graham
#1062955 added January 25, 2024 at 1:13pm
Restrictions: None
Guinea Pigs Dressed As Groundhogs
GUINEA PIG ONE (Ralph): Hey Toby! Why are we dressed up as groundhogs then?

GUINEA PIG TWO (Toby): Do you know Ralph, I have absolutely no idea.

(Ralph and Toby look expectantly at GUINEA PIG 3)

GUINEA PIG THREE (Graham): Perhaps it has something to do with groundhogs not being indigenous to the British Isles and the probable expense of hiring actual groundhogs from a zoo or similar even if they were willing to loan them out to a weirdo.

(Stunned pause)

Ralph: Erm! Are you feeling all right Graham?

Toby (Aside to Ralph): Do you think he's sickening for something?

Graham: Gottle of Geer, Gottle of Geer, Gweep!

(Ralph and Toby noticeably relax)

Ralph: Has this got something to do with Groundhog Day?

Toby: Again?

Ralph: Well it's beginning to look that way. I think he's obsessed.

Graham: A Groundhog is not just for February 2nd you know.

Toby: I'm not sure anyone ever thought that they were.

Ralph: I don't think anyone much thinks about them at all unless they're right on their doorstep.

Toby (Suspiciously): Do you think this has anything to do with merit badges?

Graham: Do either of you remember the intro to 'Hong Kong Phooey'?

(Ralph and Toby exchange glances)

Toby: Well that was a bit of a lateral jump.

Ralph: Not sure we're following you there Graham old chap.

Graham: Here it is. Check out about 0.19 seconds.



(Ralph and Toby slowly shake their heads)

Toby: You could have just said.

Graham: Where's the fun in that?
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