My Life on a Plate

Desiderata

'Go placildly amid the noise and haste and remember what peace there may be in silence...' Much as I'm not a lover of silence I do like quiet mornings. No chance in my house. Toilet door clicks, followed by deep male grunts and wind passing. Stop - too much information. Then on to the bathroom; doors banging, taps running, nose blowing reaches several hundred decibels. Clump, clump, clump down the stairs. (what sane person wears shoes in the house?) Clatter and clang as last night's pots are put away, banging of the door as the rubbish is disposed of, the crashing of bottles as they are dropped in to the recycling box. Sleep is no longer an option.

'Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit,' Very difficult in an average-sized house. At least he's gone to play golf this morning; yesterday I typed my b***...er journal to the accompaniment of the steam iron followed by the hoover. I think he'd win an award for being the noisiest person on the planet. Not man-bashing again, honestly! Just rambling, not really awake yet.

My mum is eighty-one today. Not sure she'll remember though. Over the past few years, depending on her state of mind, she's been seventy, ninety-nine or nearly eighty. Doesn't really matter, in her head she's still a teenager, as we all are. And much as she's frail and forgetful, crabby and stubborn, she's still made it to octagenarian status. As has my dad. Is longevity genetic? I sometimes think they'll outlive me.

They've lived through a war, through times when there were no fancy tests, no gyms or supplements, no warnings or sinister advice regarding health issues and despite not following any guidelines, they've made it. I've had friends in their fifties depart, despite efforts to live the perfect lifestyle. I don't condemn people who look after themselves, and I berate myself because I don't, but ultimately I do wonder if when you're time is up, it's up! What a cheerful start to the day.

Our news babbled on all day about skin cancer on Tuesday. It makes me laugh in a country that's seen about two warm days this year. Still, it doesn't matter; according to the experts we should never lie in the sun, never go out between twelve and three and wear factor fifteen at all times. No doubt, there is an increase in the incident of skin cancer, but I don't think the reasons are clear. So, are planes to carry health warnings on their sides? 'Going on holiday to a sunny climate can seriously damage your health.' Should sunscreen have 'Sunbathing Kills,' in giant letters across the bottle? Excuse me, the older I get the more cynical I become.

No politician or doctor could convince me that their words make more sense than the anonymous words written in Desiderata.

'You are a child of the Universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here; and whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.' That will do for me.

And for my readers and friends. 'With all its sham and drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy.'