Ten-Finger Exercises

the stories of our heritage

How do we become who we are? I remember a small group question that asked what our families told us about their hopes for us before we were born. A co-worker, who is now a hospital chaplain, said that his mother dreamed that he would be a man who would lead people to God.

The first stage of faith development, according to several theories, is learning who we are. Are we safe? Are we loved? Are we a Smith, or a Jackson, or a Robison? What does it mean to be a member of that family? Does our family have hopes and dreams for us?

Three stories have run through my mind today. One is that of a blogger we all know and love who told about the stories she grew up with about a dad who was her hero, until she found out they were lies.

The second story is about a man who was in a group I mentored. He had previously belonged to a fundamental sect and believed the Bible to be factually true and the inerrant word of God. As we studied Hebrew Scripture, the Old Testament, he was appalled to read that seminaries teach that Adam and Eve were not two particular, real people, and that Moses didn't really write the first five books of the OT. He said that he felt like an orphan, that all the old Bible characters had been like family to him and he'd just found out he was adopted. It was truly a painful experience for him, but one that was necessary in order to grow.

The third story is about a baby who was born in Seattle a few years ago. She had a congenital condition of the brain that meant she would not survive, would not ever progress beyond infancy; in fact she was had not been expected to even be born alive, but she lived for six months.

The family had previously been a part of a fundamentalist church, but they had moved and had not made any connection locally. The other children in the family made friends, and the parents of those friends heard about the situation. They offered help, compassion, emotional and spiritual support, and the family joined their church. When the baby died, the family had found a sense of meaning in this tragedy: the baby's mission, from God, was to convert this family to this religion.

Here's the question: are any of these people worse off for believing something that was not, or may not be, true?