The Waiting Game

Sleepless Sunday

Well, didn't get much sleep last night. And getting up to use the bathroom at any time during the night just keeps me up. Because then I can hear Z's radio. And I lie there, hearing the bass, fighting to sleep. I finally get up and sneak into his room and turn the damn thing down. Back to bed. And.......then D's tv is on. Damn cartoons! Up again. Back to bed. Thirty minutes of fake sleep just feels like a waste of time, so I'M UP!!

ON THERESA'S IPOODY

Going back to my favorties, back to the 80's, and early 90's. Now there were three I was considering putting up here, but I chose this one. Gotta love Bryan Adams. The boy can sing!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFSM1ordbo4

I am going to do something I don't want to do. Spend the money I've been saving. I swear everytime I start to get a decent stash, I knock it down a nice little peg. But, I need tennis shoes, desperately. And I decided that I'm not settling for just any pair. Nope. I have spent a week scouring the net, and all the shoe stores looking for Purple and white shoes. Should be easy. But, nope. Purple and gray is in. And oh so ugly. So I am headind off to Dick's Sporting Goods so I can blow $100 a pair of friggin shoes! This is killing me. I hate to spend $50 for something that goes on my feet.

Hell, I won't even pay Peggy to dye my hair. I buy it and do it myself. Which I did last night. And I must say...........the color is smokin hot. And Z actually said he liked it, and the funkadelic style I chose to do last night. God I love that kid. So knows how to make his mother smile. It's a gift, I swear. But I see his angle. He'll be 16 in a few weeks, and wants to buy something off the net, and wants weights.

He's actually going to try out for the school soccer team, and that makes me extremely happy. I love watching my boys play soccer. They inherited that instinct from their father, and grandfather. And when they both quit, it was heartbreaking. So I will keep my fingers crossed, cart his arse to conditioning all summer long so he has a chance of making the team. And pray that he will decide to start driving. I want it more than he does at this point And I will take him to school for his Junior year. But when he's a senior, I refuse to take them both to school. I've told him he will have a car, and he will be driving himself and D to school. I am so done. Yeah, I know. I will probably give in if he chooses not to drive, and it will suck, but damn it... I love my kids. I always put them first.

And it's funny how they notice when I start to put myself first. Z told me after I saved for months for the laptop-which hubby refused to buy me for xmas--that he'd never seen me happier. He is so right. Writing has become my life. I'm not stopping, or slowing down, or giving up. It's what I want with a passion. And truth be told, when I want something, I usually get it. Might take awhile, but eventually I will have it. Too bad I can't decide to be twenty again, and have that. Oh the things I'd do differently.

TTFN