Second Helpings

Oh Woe is Mii

I think I mentioned hubby bought me a Wii for my burpday which has proved very entertaining and offered much ego stroking. I mean, I'm pretty good on the bowling lanes and tennis courts, my golf is improving and I enjoy punching my opponent's lights out at boxing when I'm in a strop.

I bought the Big Brain Academy and have won a vast amount of gold, silver and bronze medals which quietly deceived me into thinking I may be semi-intelligent after all. The game I purchased entitled Dog island has assured me my sniffing and digging skills are well up to scratch and so the Wii has been declared a valuable addition to my home and life. Besides, it gives me a good excuse to escape hubby's constant sport on the television.

But then - enter the Wii Fitness program. Since its launch they have been like gold dust and it's almost impossible to secure one. I was lucky enough to be in a shop when they received a delivery and came away clutching my new purchase with a feeling of euphoria and renewed determination to improve my physical well being.

It only took me three days to work out why my left/right alignment was all at sea. My feet were placed perfectly on the board but every time I was told to raise my left foot nothing happened until I raised my right. Eventually I worked out I'd put the Wii footboard cover on back to front. When God gave out brains I thought he said trains and I missed mine.

So once that problem was sorted I set about with renewed enthusiasm. The initial test of balance, age, height and BMI informed me I'm overweight and have a Wii age of seventy. That, without taking into account my vices and bad habits didn't do a great deal for my self esteem.

Since then I've been working on my physical skills. Over the last few days I've been described as a first timer, a dwindling fire, a casual athlete and a couch potato by my pixel trainers. Most often I receive the comment I'm unbalanced, but I could have told them that. The only positive comment I've received was from the Yoga trainer who informed me I'm a Yoga Master, but that was only to do with breathing; something I make a habit of on a daily basis.

Oh well, nothing ventured, nothing gained. I shall persevere and hope by next summer, God willing, a new Mii will emerge thanks to my efforts. Think I've overdosed on the hula hooping however and may need a hip replacement before then.

What do you think of our Wii little Buddha here? Two months old and already wearing jeans and an expression which defies description, but convinces me he's been here before.