Who Do I Think I Am??

This one's about the old style.

THE PROMPT: "Details for library visits."

Huh??

So it goes around here sometimes, folks. How's everyone doin' tonight? Thanks for stoppin' by. As you can see, (like most of the time) I have no idea what's goin' on around here. And like most of the time, I'mma jus' wing it. Better yet, if you're familiar with "I'm Studying You" , we're gonna do it like this and take it back to 2009!

What's up Studyees? Welcome back to The Library! As all y'all know, I'm no longer chasing after the legendary Jess the CWC, nor does your boy Bert here have to walk to and from the Lancaster Public Library anymore to fill you in on his adventures when he's goin' for his newspaper, Mountain Dew and a peek at his love interest, hoping she'll give him a little more than his merch, his change, and the time of day. Nope, not anymore. Those days are through.

Listen, Stoggers. What I'm here to do tonight is give you a list of things I don't miss about having to go to the library as often anymore. Why? Cuz that's how we do things up in here, bullet-point style.

I don't miss the evil eye the crotchedy old ladies counterjockeying would give me when I asked to renew my 1-hour internet session for the 5th time that day.

While I loved the attention "The Chase For The CWC" garnered, I didn't care for the disappointment in my readers' tone when I let them down daily by not getting this chick. I mean that in a good and sincere way...y'all would be so excited, waiting to hear from me, and then days turned into weeks until Noe was finally like, "Dude, I'll come up there with Lisa and Cat and smack the shit outta her, really. Can we crash at your place?" Ohhh you Stoggers...of course I'd let them stay if it would've come down to that.

I don't miss having to sneak sips out of my St. Dew when the librarians weren't working.

I definitely don't miss the puzzled faces when I'd come up to the counter with 40 cd's I'd want to borrow just so I could load them up on my iPod, or having to explain to them why I was doing it. The head librarian was like, "You'll never listen to all of those before the due date!" No shit...it only will take me an hour to upload them all though.

I never really answered the phone when they'd call with the automated reminder about "having overdue materials".

Getting stuck on the really crappy, old, slow computer sucked.

Seeing the same, boring faces every day, and not really wanting to get to know the persons behind any of them.

I don't have to pay ten cents a page if I want to print something.

I don't miss having a valid library card anymore. The last time I tried to use it, they said I owed them money for "overdue materials". Ooooopsie.

So there you have it, Studyees. While it was a nice chance to revisit The Library for an evening to reminisce (and by "reminisce" I mean "torture myself with memories"), it's best we lock the door on it for now, at least until the next opportunity to go there presents itself. It's been fun, but I gotta get back. Don't forget to love one another, and...

MUSICAL BREAK!!

I only took you back to '09. This (which is barely audible over the voice-over) wants to take you back to '79. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isumZjs3dKA Quite a fitting title once I finally sealed the deal back in the day.

This one goes back to '89. Specifically, the summer. Another summer. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WHe5fxS3dA

And of course, the obvious selection: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDmW6RTZ5MQ What, he's too purpley to let YouTube play his jams? Laaaaame.

VITAL STATS:

Back to regularly scheduled programming in 2012.

I know you're concerned, and I'm concerned too. I finally did return all those cd's I borrowed from the Lancaster Library. I think I still owe them like $40-some odd bucks anywho. It'll be taken care of some day. Unless the county shuts the libraries down again.

I don't know that I've had two days in a row at work where I've laughed myself to tears...at least it's been quite awhile. From an assistant manager being taken out by a pen-whipping boss' dart to his leg, to checking my own dome when she whipped her pen at me (I was saved by a door frame), to all of the ridiculous chicanery and innuendo spouting, it's amazing we got any work done. Besides the overload of box jokes today, we came across a new item you'll be seeing soon on the shelves: http://www.planters.com/varieties/nutrition-information.aspx?Site=1&Product=2900... Early reports say it's peanuts, cashews, beer nuts and Viagara. And yes, no nuts were off-limits today.

From The "Stupid People" File, Bad Math Edition: A customer walks up to G-Stamm with a 300-count bottle of some kind of aspirin or vitamin, and says, "Oh, there's 300 in there. That's a whole years' worth, right?" Not on my calendar it's not.

Alrightey then. This guy has to move on with his evening. Another round of serial prompts start tomorrow, and I promise you all I'll try not to take it so seriously this time. We'll see. That said, peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NHiUQb5xg7A