Second Helpings

It never rains but...

I think I've mentioned I'm a member of a casual walking group. It 's generally good fun, healthy exercise, great company and a way of seeing new places and scenery.

Today was the chosen date for our June walk. The weather has been wet to say the least for many weeks now, so checking out the forecast was top priority before deciding to join the walk. The fact the Olympic torch arrived in our area today made it necessary to start out earlier than usual to avoid the crowds and traffic jams.

The forecast last night predicted thunderstorms and heavy rain but clearing by ten this morning. When I got up at seven there was little sign of heavy rain and the forecast had changed to storms but clearing by noon. I decided to risk it.

The group set off in heavy, humid conditions but in good spirits. Around twelve noon while crossing fields in the middle of nowhere the heavens opened. Thunder, lightning, hail, torrential almost monsoon rain accompanied us as we struggled through sodden fields, over slippery stiles and waded through knee deep swollen streams.

Occasionally we tried to huddle together under a tree for shelter, but it was useless. All walking boots and jackets were proved not to be waterproof and there was no way to keep anything dry. There were moments of hysterical laughter at the state we were all in and the ridiculous conditions in the middle of summer. Flaming June indeed.

As we squelched through one field, rain pelting down relentlessly, thunder crashing overhead I heard my iPhone playing its merry little tune in my now quite sodden bag. I knew it would be hubby, but how the hell he thought I'd be able to answer a phone in those conditions I don't know. Turns out he was calling to see if the walk had been abandoned. Maybe he thought we'd be helicopter lifted to safety or something. Shortly afterwards I heard my phone playing the last post theme tune and by the time we reached the pub for lunch it was completely dead.

Lunch was fine if you enjoy sitting in wet trousers, shoes and socks with water dripping down your back from saturated hair. The group leader who declared that once you're so wet it doesn't matter any longer and it's almost exhilarating was lucky to avoid murder, but despite all attempts at resuscitation my phone refused to be revived.

More hellish deluges and challenging conditions accompanied us back to the start of the route and I wasn't alone in just wanting to get home. In all my years I don't think I've ever experienced rain like that and never want to again.

My phone was making strange farting noises for most of the journey home but refused to do anything else. On the advice of several people it's now residing in a bowl of dry rice, but is ominously silent.

I knew I didn't need an iPhone. Neither do I need to go through the formalities of making an insurance claim after only a month of ownership. It could only happen to me. Oh well, I guess we just have to be grateful we didn't drown or get struck by lightning.

But how come they can keep the Olympic flame burning?