Sister of Mercy's World

Advice on Love and Relationships

Jan 12, 2014

Today is a BCOF free prompt day. I have chosen to share my advice on love and relationships.

First off, I'm not saying that I'm an expert by any means. I just want to share what I've learned.

The reason I want to share this is to help steer others in the right direction, so they won't make the mistakes that I have made.

Here goes.............

Things not to do in a relationship (yes, I've chosen to start here because if you know what not to do, it will bring you closer to doing the right thing).

1. Never lie- This has been a big problem for me. Yes, I admit that I told many lies throughout my almost 14 year relationship. I do sincerely regret doing this. This is the worst thing a person can do in a relationship. I've also figured out that when you do tell the truth, you're loved one will not believe you no matter what because you've lost all credibility.

2. Never cheat- I have never had a problem with this. I've always been faithful and will continue to be. I also want to make something clear. Cheating isn't just in the bedroom. It's also in kissing, flirting, lusting after, fantasizing about someone else, and emotional relationships online with others that is beyond friendship (well, it is in my opinion).


Things to do in a relationship (this is just merely what I have learned over time)

1. Always be honest. See number 1 above on why to always be honest. A relationship need honesty in order to have trust, and trust in your partner is a must.

2. Always be faithful- See number 2 explanation.... To me, if you aren't faithful, then you don't love your partner. It also leads to lies and a breech of trust.

3. Never give up on your partner. There will be good times and bad. You need to be in there for better or worse...... No matter what happens be there for your loved one.

4. Reach out and touch your partner. I'm not just referring to bedroom matters. I won't touch on those because that's a personal matter even though that's nice too. What I'm mainly talking about here are loving looks/glances, holding hands, a nice warm hug, ect.

5. Communication is key. Don't keep things from your loved one. Share your life with your partner. This has been another one of my downfalls. It's always been difficult for me to do this. When you don't communicate with your partner, it will also look like you are hiding something and lying.


Other things that I have learned.

1. Don't jump to conclusions. You may not truly know the whole story. Get all of the facts. This also comes down to constant communication.

2. Listen to your partner! I cannot talk about this enough! Another part of communication.

3. Give complements to your loved one. Always take the time to let him/her know the good things that you see.

4. Try not to constantly criticize your partner (yes, it is needed sometimes, but put yourself in the other person's shoes. Would you never want to hear a kind word again?). Try to always see the good. Lift him/her up!

5. Make a list of the pros and cons about a person. I know that it may be easier to come up with all cons, but just sit down and really think about what drew you to that person. I promise you that you will come up with some pros.

6. Forgive and Forget! Yes, I said forget too! To me, if you don't forget then you really didn't forgive.

7. Believe that people can change if they acknowledge that they have a problem and are trying to take steps to correct. Just keep in mind that change takes time and doesn't happen overnight.

8. Pray! This is really important. God can and will help you through anything if you just ask him!

Now, there are a few things in my opinion that a couple can't overcome.

1. physical abuse
2. extreme emotional abuse
3. abuse of children
4. being unfaithful (if you can't be faithful, then you should tell your partner and leave)

I hope this entry helps at least someone! I know that it has helped me by reminding me what I need to do in order to repair my relationship. I have made it my only priority!

Bye for now!

Sister of Mercy