Second Helpings

Oldest Blogger in Town

I recently had my first blog featured in a Newsletter for Authors. That's certainly a first and quite pleasing to think a blog rather than a story or poem would be selected. What interested me was the theme of the newsletter was how to describe deep emotion. I guess I'm an expert on that front by now.

I don't often read through my old blogs as I find it upsetting and painful, but I have been deleting photos posted as static items and replacing them by adding them directly to my blog entries. No doubt when I downgrade my membership the photos will disappear and it will prove to have been a waste of time, but then I'm an expert on that front too.

I started my first blog back in 2005. At that time I had two parents, a bachelor son living at home, a fairly healthy hubby, a lot of friends and a sense of humour. I find it hard to believe how things have changed since then and all the trauma and unpredictable events life has thrown my way. Seems the only thing I've managed to retain is the sense of humour, albeit rather warped at times.

But no one ever promised life was easy and you know I'm not one to complain. It's just this surreal feeling that almost ten years of blogging have passed by and though I'm grateful to still be here, I'd like to think I'd done something more worthwhile in almost a decade of time. When I think back over the years and all those I have loved and lost it all seems like some sort of hazy dream. Is this how life is supposed to be? How can anything be real when it's all so fleeting and impossible to sustain? Sometimes I get so wound up by my own thoughts and tangled emotions I find it almost impossible to express my feelings in words. I'm pleased at least the editor of the newsletter seems to think I can describe deep emotion.

I actually believe my present blog expresses more pure raw emotion and a record of life events that could never have been predicted. Since it's birth I have become an orphan, a grandmother to three beautiful children and have survived the many ups and downs of having a foreign, disabled daughter-in-law. My husband has suffered serious and unpredictable health problems and continues to do so. I have lost and gained friends and endured many days when I've just wanted to throw in the towel.

I guess this is the stuff of life. I think I have reached the stage where I no longer feel the need to blog about the every day humdrum, the niggles of growing old, the dreams I once had of a different existence, the meaning of life or the price of carrots.

But, I guess almost a decade of blogging is quite an achievement, so even though entries may be less frequent, shorter and often blander than of old, my blog is still a precious friend and confidante. How much longer it continues is an imponderable, but as I well know life is full of those.