Perpetual Ruminations

Friday

Last day of the month, and Halloween, as well. It's late and I should be off to bed, but I wanted to get an entry in before I retire. I haven't been doing the best at getting in here, but I logged an entry the first day of October and I'm going to end the month with an entry, too.

I'm feeling better, which is a good thing, but I'm still not sleeping the best. I wish I could sleep sound, and through the night all the time, like I did when I was taking the Prednisone. But, sleeping all night is the exception, and something I rarely get to enjoy. I won't complain, however, because I can usually go right back to sleep, in minutes. I wake up for whatever reason, then have to get up to take a leak, but upon returning to bed, I'm right back out, most of the time. I also enjoy the feeling I experience when I realize I don't have to get up for a while and can return to bed and sleep longer, then slip into the blankets, snuggle my beautiful wife, and drift back into slumber with her in my arms.

But, the last two nights I woke up shortly before the alarm was set to go off. I didn't realize this at the time, I just woke, had to go to the bathroom, and before returning to bed, looked to see if the automatic start on the coffee had turned on. It was still green, so not time for the coffee to start yet, meaning I get to return to bed and sleep a while longer.

Then, it was back upstairs, slip into bed, snuggle up to Rhonda and hold her in my arms, and then drift off, into -- no sleep. That's right, I didn't drift off into sleep. I closed my eyes and anticipated drifting, but nothing. I just lie there holding Rhonda, desiring to return to sleep, but no sleep. I rolled over, got all snuggled into the blankets and focused on relaxing and pleasant thoughts, and again I feel myself drifting, but not into a nice sleep. Just about, but just not quite into sleep. I roll again, get comfortable, and try to drift off again, but it's the same. No sleep, and I'm still trying when the alarm sounds.

Two nights in a row now, and I would guess about a half hour or so of trying to sleep, but no luck. And, it's not because I have been sleeping too much, I have resisted napping, and I'm only going for about six hours for the night. Hopefully tonight it doesn't repeat, and I can sleep until the alarm sounds. I did take a couple hour nap today, just because I was so tired. Maybe, just maybe it will also change my sleep pattern for the night.

Now, it's off to check the bank, since I see there was a problem with depositing some checks from our daughter.... I know, not the most relaxing task to perform right before bed, but what the hell, I haven't been sleeping well anyway.