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I’d rather write than talk. Nobody interrupts! Posting monthly or less now--see below. |
My original purpose for this blog, which I started in August of 2019, was to see if I could maintain consistency, to discover what I want to write about, and to find my writing voice. In January, I started a "niche-less" blog at Wordpress.com where I've published weekly. -- Kit’s Kontemplations  . -- I'm preparing to start a Catholic blog on Wordpress.com where I'll post weekly, and another site to put the rest of my writing. I also want to spend more time reading other blogs and offering thoughtful comments, both here on WDC and elsewhere. At most, I will publish once a month at no set time in this blog starting in September of 2020. Thank you to those who have read and rated any posts on this blog. I really appreciate it. I did NOT want to write “about” me on this blog. I wanted to share my interests, discoveries and maybe a few useful insights. If anything I've written helps even one person, whether or not they respond to the post, then this blog has been successful. |
| After decades of being “outcome focused”, I’d come to a point in my life where the process is more important than “getting stuff done”. I started with goals where I had no control over the outcome and switched to goals which were about concrete things I could achieve regardless of other factors. Only in the past few years have I focused on a few key long-term goals. These direct my strategy and choices about where I will focus my efforts. In Atomic Habits, James Clear distinguishes between the goal or result and the process or system that moves you in the direction of your goals. Prevailing wisdom claims that the best way to achieve what we want in life—getting into better shape, building a successful business, relaxing more and worrying less, spending more time with friends and family—is to set specific, actionable goals. ... Eventually, I began to realize that my results had very little to do with the goals I set and nearly everything to do with the systems I followed. ... Goals are about the results you want to achieve. Systems are about the processes that lead to those results. After putting goals in their proper and most useful context, he expresses how important it is to attach your identity to the habit you want to build. Habits that benefit us have the reward at the end; unhelpful habits have the reward at the beginning. Playing video games provide immediate pleasure and no later reward or benefit. Doing your daily exercise has no immediate pleasure but provides a reward after repeating the action regularly over an extended period of time. James suggests getting some immediate pleasure from exercise by attaching it to an aspect of your identity: “You are a person who does not miss workouts”. When you do your workout, you are casting a vote for this growing identity. If you miss one scheduled workout, forgive yourself and make sure you don’t miss the next one. This works for breaking a bad habit, or at least reducing its frequency. Concerning weight management one identity statement could be either: “I am not a person who eats junk food” or “I am a person who eats 90% healthy foods”. When I eat carrots instead of cookies, I’m casting a vote for either or both of these identities. Your habits embody your identity. Every action you take is a vote for the person you wish to become. The most practical way to change who you are is to change what you do. Habits are not about having something, they are about becoming someone. In his book, he describes the “atomic” habits we start with as being extremely small in terms of time and effort. One example he gave was of a morbidly obese man who went to the gym with the rule that he could only stay for 5 minutes for the first several weeks. The point wasn’t to exercise, it was to develop the habit of “showing up”. Even when you know you should start small, it’s easy to start too big. When you dream about making a change, excitement inevitably takes over and you end up trying to do too much too soon. The most effective way I know to counteract this tendency is to use the Two-Minute Rule, which states, “When you start a new habit, it should take less than two minutes to do.” You’ll find that nearly any habit can be scaled down into a two-minute version. ... The idea is to make your habits as easy as possible to start. If I wanted to develop the habit of writing every day, I could start with writing 3 sentences every day in my bullet journal. There are already several days a week when I want to write a lot more than that. This is for the days that I don’t want to write at all. On those days, I could write 3 sentences about anything at all. On the other hand, if I wanted to develop the habit of practicing the piano every day, I normally would have put together a practice “routine” that would take at least 45 minutes to complete. Instead, I could choose one of the components of that routine. After the end of the second week, I would add one or two more pieces. It isn’t about how much I do, it’s about developing the habit of sitting at the piano, turning it on, putting on the earphones and putting my fingers on the keys. The “gateway habit” is doing that one piece of my routine. What you want is a “gateway habit” that naturally leads you down a more productive path. ... Your goal might be to run a marathon, but your gateway habit is to put on your running shoes. That’s how you follow the Two-Minute Rule. ... People often think it’s weird to get hyped about reading one page or meditating for one minute or making one sales call. But the point is not to do one thing. The point is to master the habit of showing up. The truth is, a habit must be established before it can be improved. If you can’t learn the basic skill of showing up, then you have little hope of mastering the finer details. Instead of trying to engineer a perfect habit from the start, do the easy thing on a more consistent basis. You have to standardize before you can optimize. He gives more detailed strategies for developing beneficial habits and breaking those that sabotage us. Instead of relying on self-control to eliminate a habit, he suggests removing the cues. Don’t buy the junk food, remove the app from your phone or tablet. Make the habit as inconvenient as possible. When it comes to developing good habits, make it obvious, attractive and satisfying. Tying the habit to your identity is one way to make it satisfying. This doesn’t cover all of the gems in Atomic Habits. I highly recommend it. It was worth reading slowly and taking notes for further reflection. It validated my intuitive sense that goals were not what I needed, at least not in the way I was using them. There are some interview videos on YouTube where he explains how he gained the wisdom he shares. After watching them, I was more motivated to read the book. Atomic Habits-Amazon Use ATOMIC HABITS to Change Your LIFE! 10 Rules Summary of Atomic Habits by Sam Thomas Davies Interview with James Clear |
| When we’re learning a new skill, insecurity compels us to seek “expert” advice. From the abundance of free advice online there are three categories in which any one counsel or admonition will fall: 1. It is absolutely essential for everyone who expects to succeed to follow it 2. It is either extremely useful or seriously detrimental depending on various factors that the advisor has no clue about 3. It is offered by those with neither knowledge nor experience and therefore is universally useless. The advice: “Real writers write every day without exception” falls into the second category. I have mixed feelings about it. I can see the value in at least doing something related to writing daily. When I don’t write for a couple of days, I feel a loss of momentum and I struggle to get back to it. Yet, I find quite a few problems with this advice. Some insist that you write a certain number of words each day and others suggest writing for a specific amount of time. I would never give this advice to an aspiring writer. What counts as “writing”? Does it have to be completely new, a first draft of something? I have no specific project and no idea what I should write about most days. Does research or preparing an outline or editing a previous draft count? I’ve not seen any post advising daily writing that addresses these questions. My time is far too valuable to waste writing garbage just for the sake of meeting some arbitrary word count or time limit. I’d use my time more effectively by reading a book or blog post about writing or by working on an online writing or grammar course. Who gets to define a “real” writer? There’s no professional body that exists to accredit, license or discipline writers as there is for doctors. Therefore, in a sense, there is no such thing as “professional” writers. Is it an issue of being paid to write? If so, how much and how often must you be paid to qualify as a “real” writer? Do you have to quit your day job and support yourself solely on your income from writing? What about a writer who didn’t make enough to quit his day job until his novel was turned into a movie? Wasn’t he a writer before then? Becoming a Real Writer: What’s a Real Writer? Why does my creative process need to be defined by someone else? Depending on our obligations and life’s demands, there will be days where there is neither time nor energy to write and other days where we have both. A daily writing routine is challenging to maintain for some of us and impossible for others. Depending on our temperament and how we function, some of us can write in short bursts of 5 minutes here and there and others need a block of at least 20 minutes to settle into a creative inner space to get any writing done. Unless I’m particularly inspired, I need to be in a separate room and uninterrupted for at least 20-30 minutes. What’s the point in setting myself up to fail? If I resolve to write every day for 15 minutes or to write 200 words, I might do it for 2 weeks. Or it’s more likely that I’d only do it for two days. Then I’ll have “programmed” my brain to believe that writing every day is not useful. I may come to believe after multiple attempts that I should give up writing altogether. If you’re not a full time writer (like King and Lamott), this is terrible advice. This strategy will, in fact, reduce the probability that you finish your writing project. ... In my experience as a writer with a day job, I’ve found it’s crucial to avoid rigid writing schedules. I don’t want to provide my brain any examples of a strategy related to my writing that’s failing. ... The point is that I commit to plans that I know can succeed, and by doing so, I keep my brain’s motivation centers on board with the project. ... To leverage the psychology of your brain, you need to instead choose clear goals that you clearly know how to accomplish, and then approach scheduling with flexibility. Be aggressive, but remain grounded in the reality of your schedule. If your mind thinks you have a good goal and sees your short terms plans are working, it will keep you motivated toward completion. Cal NewportHow useful is it to force yourself to write every day? Obviously you may have to do this if you have a contract deadline to meet. This is highly unlikely for new aspiring writers. I’ve entered a few contests so I’ve written to a deadline but I don’t know if I’d want that kind of pressure on a regular basis. Once my confidence significantly increases, I may consider freelance writing. I likely would then have to write on more days than I do now and for more hours on those days. I still would not write every day. If I was able to get any freelance clients at all, I certainly wouldn’t wonder whether or not I was a “real” writer! Are you a “real writer? Hint: the answer is YES! You don’t have to write every day to be a “real” writer. You just have to write consistently. If you’re able to write every day, then do it. A mechanic is no less a mechanic by working three days a week. During this pandemic, he’s likely not working at all. I sure wouldn’t want to be the one to tell him he is no longer a mechanic! Writing is important to me but it is not the only thing in my life. It’s probably not the only thing in your life either. If you’re blogging in any serious ways, you’ve got plenty of writing-related tasks. Even without that, you have other things in your life that matter. On some days, these other things will matter more to you than writing. You’re still a “real” writer. Sources: {x-link:http://sevenscribes.com/writing-begins-with-forgiveness-why-one-of-the-most-common-pieces-of-writing-advice-is-wrong/}Writing Begins With Forgiveness: Why One of the Most Common Pieces of Writing Advice Is Wrong {x-link:https://www.well-storied.com/blog/is-a-daily-writing-routine-right-for-you}Is a Daily Writing Routine Right for You?{/x-lnk} “Write Every Day” is Bad Advice: Hacking the Psychology of Big Projects {x-link:https://nathanieltower.com/should-you-write-every-day-a-close-look-at-the-oldest-piece-of-writing-advice/}Should You Write Every Day? A Close Look at the Oldest Piece of Writing Advice |
| When I buy something new, I always read the instruction manual. I do it when the device is completely new. I do it when I’m replacing something I’ve used for decades. I read the manual that came with the last microwave I bought even though I got my first one in the early 1980s. Who knows what feature I might miss otherwise? So when I decided to return to writing after about 15 years away from it, I started looking for advice about how to do it effectively. Since I’d already realized that fiction is off the plate, this process would be less overwhelming. My first roadblock came with contradictory advice. I came across the concept of “morning pages” when I was looking for articles about increasing my creativity or removing any creative blocks. Doing them exactly the way that Julia Cameron dictates in The Artist’s Way simply did not appeal to me so I wanted to know if other people tweaked this tool to work for them. If I didn’t do this in exactly her way, would it be completely ineffective and a total misuse of my limited free time? Can I adapt it and have it still be somewhat helpful? Is the whole idea a bad fit for me and, therefore, not worth doing at all? I’ve found a lot of writing advice with some items contradicting other ones. At least one article suggested not looking for writing advice and spending that time writing. Yet, much of what I found is worth following. I’ll share about all of that in another post. Some of it is useful for others but it doesn’t work for me. Some of it is no good for anyone. The three “hazardous” suggestions were: writing with a full bladder, ignoring hunger and quitting your day job to be a “real” writer. If my bladder is full, my mind ceases to function, period. If I’m “in the flow”, I don’t notice hunger, but I wouldn’t ignore what my body needs. That’s not how I’d go about weight loss. Being retired, I no longer have a “day job”, but I’d never consider quitting it if I did so as to be a “real writer”. I already am a “real writer”. Still, I’d have taken a few days here and there to get an extra long weekend, giving me the opportunity to focus on writing if I had a deadline. Bad advice for all writers: Spelling and grammar checking software will solve all my writing problems. Spelling and grammar are not the whole of writing. There is syntax and sentence structure, not to mention the quality of the content itself. A spell-checker will not detect “too” when you meant to use “to” or “through” when you meant to use “though”. Nothing replaces the human editor who carefully examines the text and also reads it aloud so as to catch any awkward phrasing. Useful for other writers but not for me: “Challenge yourself to write something in a much shorter time than normal. “ I don’t find that applying speed helps any task to be done well, much less something creative. I understand the usefulness of shutting off the inner editor when writing a first draft so that you’re not fixing it up as you write it. I get around that by writing with pen and paper with no extra space between my lines. I’m never tempted to edit when I write this way because I know I’ll type it up in a day or two and edit as I’m doing that. I see the value in setting a timer and writing for the duration, but I do it in a slow and relaxed way. I only write at a quicker pace when my hand can barely keep up with my ideas. Although I can type faster than I can write, the ideas don’t flow through my keyboard as they do through my pen. The most common advice is to write every day. I wrote a detailed response to this in another post where I shared my personal experience with this and the result. I disagree with those who imply or say outright that you’re not a “real writer” if you don’t write every day. If it hinders you, takes you down the wrong path, f***s with (disputes) your creative process, causes more confusion than clarity, that’s bad advice. So when you’re sorting the good from the bad, go with your gut, and don’t let anyone bully you into their way of thinking, regardless of how credible, famous, or experienced they are. --How to Spot Bad Writing Advice: 6 Red Flags to Look For Reflection:  Do you look for advice when you’re trying something new or do you jump in and try your hand at it? Do you find yourself able to draw out the treasure from the trash in the advice your net scoops up? If not, why do you find this discernment difficult to do? What piece of writing advice do you most regret following and why?Sources How to Spot Bad Writing Advice: 6 Red Flags to Look For The Worst Writing Advice on the Web 11 Types of Bad Writing Advice {x-link:restraint exercised over one’s own impulses, emotions, or desires}HOW TO WRITE FASTER: 10 CRAFTY WAYS TO HIT 1,000 WORDS PER HOUR{/x-link} HOW TO WRITE ON PAPER FASTER & BETTER {x-link:https://becomeawritertoday.com/rollerball-vs-ballpoint-pens/}Rollerball vs Ballpoint Pens: A Guide{x-link} |
| If you get really lucky and succeed almost immediately at a new skill, project or venture, how much can you have learned in that process? Here are a few things this experience did not teach you: • How to accept the need to ask for help. • How to start over if you didn’t get the result you wanted • How to cope with and recover from initial, and possibly multiple, failures. • How to forgive yourself for mistakes, maintain your confidence and fix what did not work. • How to tune out negative messages from yourself or from others. • How to recognize and benefit from constructive feedback from experts or from mentors. • How to sift through contradictory advice from various sources. • How to know when you’ve done enough research then to follow your intuition to move forward. • How to avoid comparing your progress with others in your field who started at the same time as you did. • How to discipline yourself to take the next step when all you feel like doing is surfing social media, binge-watching Netflix or playing video games. Significant setbacks, minor disasters and/or progress that is much slower than you want or expect are all opportunities to grow and learn. They are not occasions for complaining, comparison or self-condemnation, behaviours that seem to be our default setting. In addition to signalling the need for reassessment, these challenges can push you to increase your knowledge and skills through courses, conferences and coaching. When you hit a small or large speed-bump, it is time to reflect and to develop clarity about the specific result you are seeking. Consider carefully why it matters and how important it is for your short-term goals and long-range plans. If you don’t have a clear vision of your destination and a sense of the milestones along the way, how will you recognize your progress or catch yourself chasing distractions because you’re afraid to miss out on something important? Slow progress provides the necessary time to develop skills through frequently and regularly repeating the same set of tasks while always considering ways to improve your processes. If you’re a marketer, it’s sales calls; if you’re an author, it’s writing, if you’re a blogger, it’s writing, image creation, and website management. It requires an acceptance of boredom, a tolerance for frustration and a willingness to tackle tedious tasks daily for years. An extended delay gives the seed of passion time to grow. When it takes a lot longer than we like to get the result that we want, our desire intensifies. The longer we must wait and the more it costs in time, energy and sacrifices of other things which we value, the more we’ll appreciate the success when it arrives. Reflection:  Are you currently enjoying success at something you’ve wanted and worked toward for a long time? What things or activities did you give up to make it happen? Are you working toward a dream now? Have you clearly defined in your mind what it will be like and why you want it? Have you written it all down? Have you given up on a dream after working at it for a while? Why did you decide that it either wasn’t worth the effort, or that you weren’t capable of making it happen? Were you afraid of failure, of success, or maybe, of both? |
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Yes, I know some people do that but I'm a creative writer not a journalist. Poetry sells ... but it's a money-maker for only a few. I write A LOT. Almost 180 pieces since Spring equinox. My goal is 300-400 per year. One year I went over 1,000. I need to do more editing, polishing, sharing, submitting. Writer's block? Who has time for that? I don't.