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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1102714-State-Farm-Nshorance
by Luster
Rated: E · Short Story · Comedy · #1102714
Luster's phone call to his insurance agent after an automobile accident...
‘State Farm Nshorance’



Receptionist: "State Farm Insurance".

Luster: " Can I speaks wit Mr. Dan Williams?"

Receptionist: " Whom may I say is calling?"

Luster: " It's me.......Luster?"

Receptionist: "Just a minute please, let me see if he is in?"

Dan Williams: " Hello, Luster....How you doing?"

Luster : "Hey Mr. Dan."....".Pretty fair I guess".....

Dan Williams: "What can I do for you today.........Luster?"

Luster: "Mr. Dan, you knows how I got's my nshorance under you?"

Dan Williams: " How could I forget something like that.... Luster?"

Luster: " Well, yes-sir.........I understands................Well I needs to report another car accident."

Dan Williams: "Was anybody hurt this time, .....Luster?"

Luster: " Naw Sir".....Weren’t nobody hurt….

Dan Williams: "Well that's the main thing......Now tell me what happened?'

Luster: "You remembers bout 6 months ago when Flossie had dat wreck in da driveway and tore up boaf my cars..........You said dat most wrecks happens wit-in 25 miles of where you stays at?" "Do ya remember dat, Mr. Dan?"

Dan Williams: "Yea that's a true statement Luster.....I remember telling you that ." Now what happened?"

Luster: "Well,... us dun had another one of dem wrecks......wut wuz wit -in 25 miles of where we stays at."

Dan Williams: "Which vehicle did you wreck this time................Luster?"

Luster: "Boaf."

Dan Williams: " What do you mean .....Both?"

Luster: "Well Mr. Dan....................It were boaf of em again"......................

Dan Williams: "Ah Hell!!....Luster!!!!!.......You mean to tell me, yall dun wrecked both your cars again.?"

Luster: "Yes-sir."

Dan Williams: "Well where abouts did this wreck happen Luster..?

Luster: " Da same xzack place as befoe............."

Dan Williams: "You mean....... in the driveway again?"

Luster: "Dat's right ................in da driveway again ...."

Dan Williams: "Was it Flossie again?"

Luster: "Naw sir....It weren't none a Flossie dis time."

Dan Williams: "Well who was it?"

Luster: " It were one of my girl twins....dis time."

Dan Williams: "Luster ....I don't show them covered on your insurance policy?"

Luster: "Naw - sir... dey ain't under no nshorance program yet."

Dan Williams: " Why Not?"

Luster: "Cause dey ain't got no driver's license yet."

Dan Williams: "Well why not?"

Luster: " Cause dey only be's 14..."

Dan Williams: "Luster .....what you mean letting a 14 year old drive your cars?"

Luster: "I ain't let em drive nuthin......they dun it on they own......Dey says dey was jus practice driving."

Dan Williams: " Now let me see if I got this right?..........In the last 6 months you’ve reported two automobile accidents……. involving both your automobiles, both times, and both times it was in your driveway..............and this time a 14 year old was behind the wheel?"

Luster: "Yes-sir das right." .................."Can ya hep me?"

Dan Williams: " Luster I'm gonna forget you ever made this phone call to me...................... and I want you to forget that you ever made this phone call ....to me........You understand!!"

Luster: " Naw-sir......I ain't sure dat I do's.........."

Dan Williams: " Well let me put it to you this way, Luster.................If I were to report this claim,............. there ain't a Insurance company on Planet Earth, that would even think about giving you any insurance.!!!!!!!! So you best forget it."

Luster: "Yes-sir....Thank-you sir"................."Tootles."

© Copyright 2006 Luster (tgbarnes3 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1102714-State-Farm-Nshorance