I found "Of Blood and Beasts" on the Noticing Newbies page. I love fantasy and the no dialogue challenge aspect was interesting, so I decided to give it a read.
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Overall Impression
I found the story entertaining, to say the least. It was short and nicely written. You did a great job conveying Logan's actions and motivations, and I really liked the bittersweet feel of the ending.
What I Liked
I really liked the no dialogue aspect and that it seems to be about werewolves (or skin-walkers, maybe?).
What I Didn't Like
There wasn't really anything I didn't like.
My Suggestions
Your sentence structuring could use some work—they were a bit longwinded at times—and your lexicon could stand to be expanded. That said, there was nothing major that I could find to pick at. For examples of what I mean, see the dropnote below.
Note
Long sentences are fine as long as they're understandable. If they can be broken up though, I've found most readers seem to prefer that. Myself included. Also, keep in mind that I'm not in any way saying that your writing is bad by including these examples. The following are just my opinions.
Examples L1S2"Logan, covered in his own blood, stopped to catch his breath, his foggy breath clouding from the cold."
At eighteen words, this sentence isn't incredibly long. Its delivery and the way readers receive it could both benefit from breaking it up though. By doing so you could also avoid the repetition of 'breath'. E.G."Logan, covered in his own blood, stopped to catch his breath. It came out in a fog, clouding from the cold."
Alternatively, if you wanted the sentence to read more as one you could connect the two sentences in my example with a semicolon for the same effect.
L34S1"Straining, Logan reached for his dagger, which had been knocked away, and pressed the blade deep into the wolf's shoulder."
Once again, this sentence isn't incredibly long. It is sort of long though. And it also feels somewhat off when I read it, due to the additional knowledge about his dagger being knocked away added in the middle. Breaking it up could fix that. E.G."Logan's dagger had been knocked away. Straining, he grabbed (for) it, then pressed the blade deep into the wolf's shoulder."
I'm not a huge fan of using 'and' unless it's absolutely necessary or adds to the feel of a sentence in some way. It's such a common word that it can become repetitive very quickly. Which is why you may notice that I've used 'then' in my example.
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Great Work & Happy Writing,
I saw your review request for "The Girl From Mile End. Ch 1." on the Please Review page. I tend to favor fantasy over historical drama, but I quite like books like Shanghai Girls and The Things We Cannot Say as well, so I thought I'd give it a read.
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Overall Impression
Dialogue is always a good starter. The short exchange at the beginning between Elise and Alice that led to the descriptive paragraph drew me in. That said, as I kept reading, I did begin to feel a bit overwhelmed by the amount of dialogue in the story. It was very back and forth, and I had to reread quite a few parts because I had trouble following who was speaking. It felt sort of monotone. I wasn't able to form much of a connection with any of the characters, which I, personally, would need to want to continue reading the story as a whole.
What I Liked
I liked the way your story flows. Each scene had a day-in-the-life feel to it, which I consider important in historical war dramas.
What I Didn't Like
I didn't like that the story was primarily dialogue dependent.
My Suggestions
Try to flesh out the story with more description in-between the dialogue. Whether it's environmental, action, or the lead's thoughts, feelings and observations, I think adding more description would help to keep readers engaged.
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