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26
26
Review of Sierra the Robot  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

For SuperPowers

*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*GREETINGS!!!*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* Overall Impressions:
I loved your story. You had a great story line going on there. I adored the characters. I enjoyed the dialogue. I liked how you followed through the emotions of the main character and set a character goal. I didn't get how getting presents is not part of enjoying life but the rest is fine. I'd like to see more excitement and passion injected in Dr. Samuel's character. He had just created a body for his robot. This is probably his first prototype and never done before. What's missing to me, if that's the case, is his excitement that he could not contain. He sounded like he has done this many times before. It would be nice if Dr. Samuel started saying something incoherent (science-related or scientific facts) and absolutely nerdy but understood and clarified by the robot. All in all, I enjoyed the story very much. It has potential to become even better and I think you did a fantastic job on this piece. Well done! *Heart* *Star*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
Your story still requires editing. I spotted a few run ons, typos, etc. Really, nothing major but it's not perfect yet. I won't point out what corrections are needed but have a look at these sentences:
*Duck* "Dad, you know I'm an A.I," I said. Let me explain myself, I'm an advanced self-aware A.I. created by Dr. Samuel. I was created roughly twelve years ago today, I'm turning thirteen today.
*Duck* "Now... would you like some cake?" My father said mischievously.
*Duck* "Can I eat? Should I eat sweats so soon after being implanted into my new body?" I asked myself, I must admit I am eager to try eating. (Is cake a sweet? It's sweet but it's not a sweet, right?)
*Duck* I had gone from a wireframe hologram to flesh and blood... well a convincing simulacrum at the very least
*Duck* "Well, you know how you've been bugging me about getting a body ever since you first passed the Turning Test for the first time?" Dr. Samuel said./ "You created me ready. I have even passed the Turing Test," I said excitedly. (Is it Turing or Turning Test?
*Duck* "Yes, the boys have been making this Biodroid body for you for the past year." Dr. Samuel explained. (Do inject more emotions in dialogues like these.)
*Duck* "Alright, I was only curious. I'm prepared for the upload." I said, excited and anxious for this new change. Several minutes later the Biodroid was ready for me to upload into. A special cable was connected between the Biodroids head and my terminal. (Would love more description on this too. It's good.)

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* I had gone from a wireframe hologram to flesh and blood... well a convincing simulacrum at the very least.
*Trainp* Inside of it was a Human girl suspended in a green liquid. "Your new body!" Dr. Samuel said proudly. (Could you describe this a little bit more though? I want to imagine her more vividly.)

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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27
27
Review of A Good Heart  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

** Image ID #1882804 Unavailable **

*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*GREETINGS!!!*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* Overall Impressions/ Random Chatter:
Wow. Talk about randomness. Your item appeared in the Rate & Review randomiser thing. Wow. That is one demented story. You kept me engaged throughout the story. I was prepared for more comedy from you and that scene from the library made me laugh and I was hoping Mary would knock his head for rejecting her. Maybe knife him at some dark, gloomy corners. That was what I was expecting when I read on so there was an element of surprise for me as you began to reveal how demented the professor is. I began to think he is a rapist but then, you did not stop there and continued developing the story in a way that made me realise that he is just this sick psycho murderer and OMG! That girl is gonna die a very horrible death. Nope, but you gave me another element of surprise again when the girl actually is an FBI agent. Your story is full of surprises. I was not expecting it at all. I loved how you developed your character, adding layers upon layers as your reader, me, went along your story. Each time you add some information on your character, it gave me a new light and changed my perception of your MC. The coordination of thoughts, action, drama, situation, surroundings are all a natural flow. Your story played with my emotions. Plot is excellence, not only engaging but full of plot twists but not too overpowering. I loved your writing style and you have very good vocabulary range (I had to look at the dictionary) which further enriched your story. Your story is easy to follow and your dialogues set the mood of the story rather well and played an important role in telling the story better. Your yellow awardicon is well-deserved. Thank you for sharing your story.

P/S: You made me read this in office. It felt SO WRONG! *Rolling*

P/P/S: I wonder how many girls did your MC murder? I'm curious.

*Owl3* Typos/ Grammar:
None spotted! Hooray!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* He mulled over the notion for a moment. No. He mustn't be an imbecile. Of course she wasn't attracted to him. He'd misread the situation. And besides, physical interaction between himself and a student here could prove a poisoned chalice.
*Trainp* Two or three girls every year had enjoyed the privilege of his undivided attention, and he'd once stolen the heart of a Nigerian princess.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

Writing.Com Signature Image for Upgraded Registered Authors!

218143218143

This is my Sig created by Shannon .


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
28
28
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
I loved your story! *Heart* I like that you told the story in a form of letter. I love the plot. I thought it was swell that an ordinary main character who was just too busy body ended up as the staff of a USA President. *Laugh* What a dream that is and all he needs to do is type. It is so hillarious too that the main character thanked his mom for coercing him to go for his typing class and that how he is a fast typist now. *Rolling* It's like a piece of jigsaw puzzle and you managed to keep them all fitted in. Nice job! Naturally, I love your characters. Your flow of story and sentence structure is absolutely flawless. You even included some punchlines and made us all laugh. I love your dialogues. They are the juiciest part of your story. You actually made me Google Barton Robinson. I am wishing this story is actually true. Life is after all stranger than fiction. Blimey, I didn't find anything on him though. I didn't check if the speech is authentic but I'll take it from you. I believe you because your story sounds so legit, even though it can't have happened. *Rolling* I don't know. Please tell me this is based on a true story? Thanks for sharing your story. The awardicon is well-deserved. You are a star! *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
No grammar or typos spotted. Hooray!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* "No Sir, I was on a tour and stopped to look into the Press Room. A gentleman asked me to type something. I did what I was told, Sir"
*Trainp* I know you've always taught me to follow the rules, Ma, but sometimes a bit of rebellion can lead to great things. Maybe, I was inspired by the ghosts of Washington and Jefferson and a few of those who wrote the Declaration of Independence.
*Trainp* One of the men grabbed my arm and growled, "Can you type, boy?"

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
29
29
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* General Comments:
It is so endearing that it's all you and your hubby talk about. *Rolling* It's kinda demented as well. A Basset Hound is uber cute! *squeal* I loved everything about your piece, from the way you started your story (a very interesting starting line) and how it just flows through, then finally, how you ended it. The style is unique. I like how you started with a line and then tell a whole story then continue from where you started off, why you guys are talking about poop. I loved how you described your doggie, your hubby and yourself, your thoughts, allowing me to understand everyone a little better. I thought you were talking about a baby at first. I mean, a human baby. It kind of makes sense, of course because a human baby wouldn't have pooped EVERYWHERE. I think. At least. Cheese-eating dog... You feed Boo cheese and she likes it? *Rolling* I love your unexpected punchlines. Who adopted who? *Rolling**Rolling**Rolling* You make me so glad that my hubby and I talk about Game of Thrones, and not... about poop. YET. Thank you for sharing your lovely story! This is one pet story I'd remember for a long time. *Heart* *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

Suggestions:
No grammar spotted. Hoooray!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* It has been this way since she adopted us more than five years ago.
*Trainp* Boo has a way of glaring at us, if we forget, that makes us remember soon enough.
*Trainp* We never found the foil.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
30
30
Review of THE ANGRY PATIENT  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (4.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
Nice take on this. You rated this as experience. I wonder if you went through the horrendous ordeal of having to wait to be seen by a doctor in the hospital. This is something that would probably go in my mind should I have to wait that long for medical attention and any medical attention needed in a hospital is urgent. This simple dialogue is very real though. It is a problem that happens in my own country, the difference between private and public hospitals. It can even happen in private hospitals where you need to pay lots and lots of money to see a doctor. I found it unique that you translated this to a script play. I wonder if you would expand on this. There are some lack of punctuations though which needs to be looked into. I think you have a strong plot there and nice intro going on there. I do wonder though that if the nurse's badge is that easy to remove. It should be placed on where a man's breast pocket is. Isn't that also considered molestation? Just wondering because I do not know where else a nurse's badge might be. I Googled and yeah, if it's like a clipped on name tag, I guess it is easy to remove but it's still indecent to grab a nurse's badge. I think that guy is in a lot of trouble. *Shock2*

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of I'm Okay  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
I think you are so right. I am one of those guilty of just skimming through my own thoughts when I asked someone else how they are doing when all I am interested in is telling them how I am doing then start judging others for not listening to me then I start hating myself for it. But you see? Here I go again... and you were saying... My first encounter with someone writing about pain is Adrie's. I understand what you mean when you talk about units and it's how Adrie says it when she have to count how many spoons she has at the start of the day and work with it. I've heard of all the conditions you have in Doctor House before (TV series) *Facepalm*. I cannot imagine how one endure so much pain but from what I read, you are so strong! I like how you put in the third person dialogue. It creatively expressed how you felt in a lighter kind of tone. It is difficult to write about a health condition you go through. Some people write it for so many different purposes. Some write to explain to others what's going on, out of love. Some wants more care because, it is so hard to go through this alone, some may want others to notice their pain to cope. A coping mechanism. You tell it so matter-of-fact-ly, I can only flinch at what you go through. I know so little of these conditions and I hope... for some sort of relief. Isn't there any drugs that could help you? Surely, you would have taken it if you could. You are so wise though, trying to look at this at a bigger picture. Thank you for sharing your story. *Hug* *Heart* I hope everyday will be more than okay for you. I like your sentence structure. You write with clarity, with a sense of purpose and you have delivered them well. You made me feel what you could have felt. I can only imagine. *Sad* Rock on, Vivian! *Hug* *Heart*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
Nothing. *Laugh*

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* You asked me, "How are you?" but hardly paused for an answer as you continued on your way. My answer would probably have been "Okay" or "Fine." However, you perhaps should know the truth so that you can have an opportunity to understand my struggles.
*Trainp* “I’m not hurting and feel good, so I must be dead,” was the answer.
*Trainp* How do I feel? At times, I’m overwhelmed, discouraged, hopeless, and helpless; but I’ll try to smile and answer, “I'm okay” as I pray for strength to get through another day. *shrugs* After all, life is what you make it, or rather what I make it.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
32
32
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
You know we don't have enough C-Notes or... rather, we can't have enough of C-Notes. Scrap my previous statement. I love how you have C-Notes for all occasions!!! Gahhh!!! There goes my gps! I'm a sucker to C-Notes. I feel that it is a must when you want to whisper sweet nothings to other WDCers. First of all, I give five stars for your creativity and the variety you offer in your C-Notes shop. I should drop by here more often. Next, I have to give you kudos for that super HOT C-Note shop you have! You know exactly what C-Notes we need. Note on NEED and not want. *Laugh* The Booster one is awesome too. I give you another five stars for its aesthetics. Yeah, your C-Notes are so beautiful. I love those postcards too. Your shop is original, unique and caters to all different purposes. An important element to keep your customers coming back for more of your C-Notes. I'm sorry I didn't notice this before. Now, I do, thanks to Game of Thrones. Now go kiss the Iron Throne. *Rolling* Thank you for sharing! *Heart* Thank you for spreading all the positivity throughout WDC, Gaby! You are doing an awesome job! *Heart*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
More... more... more.... errr.... unfortunately... we can't have enough C-Notes. Just kidding. It is enough. Well, can't hurt to have more eh? *Wink*

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
33
33
Review of Frogs and toads.  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
Rich, I've always loved your sense of humour. I wouldn't know the difference between a toad and a frog but you told me to read a lot so I had to rock it your way and Wikipedia it. Soon. I can't quite distinguish whether your essay is a poem or simply an essay that wants to rhyme at the end of every sentence. I'm thankful to have known you as many WDCers would. I often wondered what's in your head, how you think. You're such a unique individual, it reflects in your writing. You have a sort of style that tell us, "That was written by Rich." Surely, there is something of yours that we can hold and flip? Your writing has a certain charm to it that holds the essence of your personality. It's endearing. You give wise-old tales with, at times, the twist of wit. You are the king of satire. I've known countless of lame jokes but yours are one of class. The famous frog prince may never turn into a prince after all. It is all a lie. Bedtime stories are the best part of childhood. Thank you for sharing your lovely snippets, Rich. *Heart* You've always been clever and I'm a fan of your writings. *Heart* *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
Nope. Nothing. Maybe... get published if you're not already?

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
For the layman, or the general Joe, or Sue, it is good to know about the things we are told.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
34
34
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
Wow! What an amazing story! I loved how you started your story and how you grabbed my attention with the impossible. How would one ever call God? To be honest, I still don't get what you mean: What is 74J-ESUS? How do you even dial that? I mean, our phones only have numbers... I would like that clarified. There's nothing to say about dialogues since it really took place. I think you pushed your point forward and we understood it well, as readers. I can imagine the shock I would feel if I dialed that number and someone actually answered. *Rolling* Thank goodness you didn't answer, "Uhhh, Jesus? Is that You?" That would turn your story to a comedy. *Rolling* You guys should totally keep in touch! I mean, what a rare way to actually meet someone. Did you find out more about this person? Who he is, what is he like, where he stays, etc? Surely he found your story amazing. Thanks for sharing this lovely story! It is unique and I enjoyed reading it. *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
No grammar or typos spotted. Hooorayyy!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* I almost fainted when a deep strong male voice said, "Hello."
*Trainp* It was a person whose phone number was 74J-ESUS.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
35
35
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
Ahhhh! The ever popular Myer Briggs personality test. It seems like being an extroverted introvert is kind of a trend these past few years. I am an introverted introvert so I am actually kind of envious of extroverted introvert. *Laugh* I think your little essay here has served its purpose. It made me understand what the extroverted introvert means. I think I might be gearing towards there since society has forced me to talk a little bit more i.e. the workplace. I think you have achieved the 4Cs in writing—clarity, concise, coherence and control. Heard that before? Believe me, that is something that I'm trying to achieve as well for non-fiction writing. Your writing is direct, straight to the point, easy to understand and purposeful. It did not confuse me. It clarified what I didn't know about extroverted introvert. Well, would have since I have read this before on the social media. This is a great response to the prompt. Studying personalities is an interesting subject matter especially for us authors. Thank you for sharing this little essay with us! Well done! *Heart*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
No grammar or typos spotted. Hooorayyy!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* So, what do I do? I talk. I talk and talk and talk. Talking is what gives folks the idea that I am an extrovert. How could I possibly be shy when I talk so much? Believe me, it is possible.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
36
36
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
What? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! You can't do this! Nooooooooooooooo!!! *throws tantrum* I did not see the end coming at all. It was supposed to be a sweet, romantic story. How could you let it end so cruelly? *Sob* I want to see them get married and live happily ever after. How could a little girl's dream be the cause of their end? Perhaps it was the prophecy of their end. I cannot accept that. What a shock you gave me! *Sob* You know you nailed the story by the way you gave me this truly shocking ending. *sigh* You painted the characters so beautifully. It seemed to be a romance story that is so sweet, it melted my heart. The dialogues were so mushy, so unbelievable. You even included so many symbolisms in your story, the colourful hot air balloons, the dying little girl who drew angels in the sky. Is that a foreboding element in your story? I so did not see it. *Sob* The scene in the clinic was my favourite. I can picture how the characters met and how special that moment felt. I love your descriptions and how you ease us into your plot. Your evil plot! I don't know. I just loved your story so much. I cannot accept the ending. It's such a beautiful ending though. The spectacular colours. Thanks for sharing and well done. *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
*Duck* You wouldn't think twenty-two five-year-olds would be so challenging.
*Duck* Most days, she felt like she was being paid to play.
*Duck* It is a sugar-coated one like you get at a carnival?

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
There are too many but here are some:
*Trainp* The sky was a spectacular robin blue from God's paint set. The wind, a gentle giant, blew them with his softest breath.
*Trainp* Her answer was never heard./ The end came so fast, there was no time for pain or tears./ It was an explosion that lit up the sky. The remains of the balloon was a rainbow of flaming colors.
*Trainp* A golden haired toddler came up to him and offered her worn doll./ "What's her name?" he engaged the child in conversation./ "Suzy."/ "I like that name. She's pretty."/ The child grabbed her doll and ran back to her mother./ He laughed. It was a marvelous laugh./ Jewel knew there was something special about him.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
37
37
Review of Hidden Lies  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* General Comments:
Hmmmm. I didn't quite buy the story and I had trouble following it the dying man's words. I'm not too sure if it is deliberate. I found Phillip being overly dramatic. Children quarreling over what their father has done in the past when their father might die any time? No matter how spiteful, surely they wouldn't show themselves in front of a dying old man? Okay, that is possible but make me believe it in your story. Either I didn't believe Phillip's character or I disliked him. If I did dislike him, then you did a great job. Unfortunately, I can't quite decide which it is. I personally felt the story was a bit too dramatic which made it kind of forced? So, the plot didn't feel quite natural to me. I don't think the plot is strong enough. I want to like Karen because she is the main character and she is portrayed as independent and strong but I need her characterisation to be painted more vividly for me. I didn't get enough of her so I didn't get engaged to the story, the plot or the characters. Having said that, I do like the ending though. I thought it was a clever twist that Austin married the widow. I would like more clarity in the sentence structure. There are rooms for improvement for the dialogues. I loved your intro. I think it is fresh and original. I honestly think that if the dramatic elements of this story is toned down more, this will make a good story. Overall, there is still room for improvement.This story does have its potential. Thanks for sharing and write on.


*Owl3* Suggestions:
Less on the drama, more on the story to make it more believable? More focus on building on the story and characters.

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* The bright sun and balmy breeze tempted Karen to turn around and run from the sorrow awaiting her and her brothers at the top of the steps. The house appeared sad to her since her mother’s death, as if it were in mourning. However, it never seemed as full of grief as much as it did...
*Trainp* A smile of remembrance crossed her father’s face. “Ah, yes, you see, Mrs. Dodson was a young widow, and we discovered we had many things in common.” His laugh this time was full of delight. “You called her Momma.”

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
38
38
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
What a wonderful way to answer to this prompt. I found it original, refreshing and unique. I found your writing style engaging. You have what I like to read in novels. The pace is slow. I enjoyed reading and feeling the thoughts of the main character and travelling with her. The prejudice felt real. It could have happened to me and I felt like I owned those thoughts you wrote. I felt such a strong connection to your character. I found your characters vividly painted which is one of the key reasons why I could connect to closely to them. Everything you wrote in your story felt so natural. This story is an impeccable narrative. The most crucial part in your story is so subtle that it may be easily missed. It's beautiful, lyrical. You made English sound so beautiful by the way you weaved your words. It may seemed like a simple story but there is a deep underlying symbolism to this. It holds the theme about living in harmony with different races, deciding to treat others fairly and equally. It is about acceptance. Whether it is your sentence structure, your style, your pace, your characters or plot, they seemed to complement each other, feeding a bigger picture of life. I found that very powerful and moving. Thank you for sharing your lovely story. Your awardicon is well-deserved. Well done! *Heart* *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Typo/ Grammar:
None spotted. Hoooray!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* The haunting reflection of a young man's face in the window startled me initially, as he paused in the corridor outside my compartment. I turned to meet his penetrating gaze, and I could see he was no more than a lad of middle teen years, at most.
*Trainp* When our eyes met, there was a flicker of recognition, then relief when he realized I was a woman traveling alone and certainly no sort of threat to a healthy young man of Middle Eastern origin.
*Trainp* "Palestinian terrorists," was how they described the suspects after our train was halted in Berlin and searched from top to bottom.
*Trainp* In the current climate of hysteria, I knew that a young Arab boy would be seized and put only God knows where until the world sorted itself out.
*Trainp* It was with great relief that I subsequently learned that the missing "terrorists" were in fact a middle aged couple and no more terrorist than I. The fullness of time has a way of dashing rumors and innuendo to shreds.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of His Mother's Eyes  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* General Comments:
Now, that is just plain cruel. I was expecting an ordinary story of a man dying of cancer. (Kinda forgot this is after all the mystery genre.) I thought that your storyline was impeccable. Loved your intro. Your description of the wires being strapped to the body is excellent. It made me think of my own experience when I see relatives in the hospital, suffering for illnesses such as cancer. Your plot is fantastic. Your story structure is flawless. You built your story so ever slowly but the pace is perfect. I didn't feel a tinge of impatience because your style of writing is rather engaging. I wanted to know everything about the characters. I have grown to love them because I understood them. I sympathised with them. I expected it to be a straight forward story so I was surprised when it turned into a story about murder. I think the son did it, right? And, goodness... what good is it to murder a man dying of cancer? *Facepalm* I absolutely loved how you described the character's backstory. It is very well told and one that requires a certain art to writing. I love the suspense you've created and the climax of the story... I didn't even see it coming. It ended too soon for me and I didn't like the ending although it's the perfect ending to your story. You are a very good writer. The flow of the story is so natural, so is everything else. I loved your story. Thank you for sharing it. *Heart* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr* *Star*

*Owl3* Grammar/ Typos:
None spotted. Hoooray!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* A large shunt jutted from the top of his right hand, permanently stuck into his artery like a miniature harpoon.
*Trainp* And I found myself wishing she could be like that all the time. I was so damn exhausted. So, before I headed off to bed, I fluffed up her pillow. The next thing I knew, the pillow was in my hands, and I was pushing it over her face.
*Trainp* Her screaming and cussing was muffled like I had always hoped it would be, and then it just stopped altogether. I was free."
*Trainp* "You killed her? My God, Dad!" Chris stood up, backing away from the bed.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* General Comments:
Oh. My. God. That was good. That was so freaky! Reading that piece left an echo behind. It's chilly. It's eerie. You controlled your readers' thoughts with your words. That is an accomplishment for any writer. Well done! The sentence structure is wonderful. Your pacing is perfect. The plot is awesome. You build your story very well and you gave the suspense it needed. Your story has a solid foundation: a strong beginning, a story development, a climax, the resolution. You made my emotions go up and down. You made me cringe. I like your writing style. I like your characters. I'm horrified that Mindy had to find her husband's body that way. I want to know who did it. I'm angry the case is not resolved. *Sob* The torture of the mystery genre. I am very attached to the characters because you have built a connection between me and the characters. You made me like them by the way you described them. They felt so real to me. Thank you for sharing this story with us. You are a very good writer. The awardicon is so well-deserved. Well done! *Star**Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
*Duck* When Corey Nelson’s mother answered the door, she said he was still asleep, but Ben was more than welcomed to go upstairs and
*Duck* As Ben got to the top landing and started toward Corey’s open bedroom door, he thought he saw something quickly flashed across the room.

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* The seven-year old’s body had been violently ripped apart, his blood still dripping down the walls and from the sheets of his bed, his limbs scattered across the once blue shag carpet. Several large pieces of flesh had been removed from the torso, as if something had been chewing on the child after his demise.
*Trainp* When Mindy came home early from her meeting that bright summer morning, she witnessed a terrible sight. Not only was her husband’s body violently ripped apart with several large pieces of flesh removed from his torso, but there was also a top hat sitting on the kitchen table.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Blue Coma  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (3.5)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* General Comments:
I was expecting this to be another story of an accident victim so I was surprised by the ending. Well, I've neither given birth yet nor been under anaesthesia so I cannot relate if this really goes through one's mind when one is drugged. However, I found it strange that the main character senses a feeding tube and oxygen. I wonder how does a subconscious person feel a feeding tube and oxygen tube? Wouldn't it be felt penetrating into the nose or throat or whatever there is? That part didn't seem quite believable for me. I get it that the main character might be drugged so surely the numbness might just make the main character be drowsy? Well, sorry. Overall, while I loved the monologue and how the main character felt like she is in outer space, it didn't feel believable that she is going through all this because she just gave birth. Maybe, it is because I want to know more and feel more of her pain or her numbness. I, as a reader, want to feel more. I want to know everything about her feelings. I want to be her, especially when this is a monologue. I want to believe in the story, in the pain. This story didn't achieve that for me. *Sad* Having said that, I spotted a few descriptions that I really like and I've listed it down below.

*Owl3* Suggestions:
I noticed you spell cannot as can not. It's one word. There were a few punctuation issues and if the separation of paragraphs is more distinct, I think it's easier to read. I point out the sentences below:
*Duck* I cannot tell.
*Duck* But whatever it is that confines me does not seem to touch me. (Fragmented sentence)
*Duck* No! Shadows of movement is a better description of what I think I see.
*Duck* Strangely though I have sensations, feelings of calm, peaceful.
*Duck* Perhaps they have me medicated, yes, I must be sedated.
*Duck* Artificially, fed through tubes, even my oxygen is not my own. I found this hard to believe.

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* I’m only aware of being aware.
*Trainp* ...but strangely I’m becoming aware of me.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Doggie Time  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
This review is brought to you by "Game of Thrones" :
House Florent Image for G.o.T.


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr* GREETINGS! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* General Comments:
This piece made me wonder: Is life as a dog really all that great? Who knows what are on the doggie's mind? They probably have issues they view as big problems like getting their owners' affection, being completely helpless, etc. *Laugh*The grass is after all always greener on the other side. Just wondering. It's a wonderful observation piece you've written. I like your writing style. I loved how you described the life of a dog, how life centralises around him, how envious it makes your readers feel and conclude like you did-yeah! You delivered your message strongly to your readers: Life as a dog rocks! I wanna be a dog too! It is awesome having a dog too. Dog lovers will love your little story and it will spur everyone else to share their own dog stories. Yep, this story has that potential. I can feel the happiness emanating from your story be it from the doggie or owner point of view. Yes, I love the mood you created. Just as bad as scrolling through cat videos on Facebook, this story will make it to the list of cute pet stories. It would. *Laugh* Thanks for sharing your story. *Rolling* It's such a joy to read.

*Owl3* Suggestions:
*Duck* The day after, he is recovering from his psychedelic experience by lying on the balcony in the sun.

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* My dog is stoned. He is on methadone and is hallucinating his little head off. What he is experiencing, The Great Dog Master only knows, but it's looking scary.
*Trainp* When I return in an afterlife I want to be a dog.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On!


*Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Enough  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

** Image ID #1882804 Unavailable **

*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*GREETINGS!!!*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* General Comments:
This is a beautiful, emotional piece. I felt what your character felt, the heartache, the regret. You have delivered her thoughts, her doubts, her hopes and her disappointments very well. The story flowed well. It's all about two characters—a father and daughter relationship. The love and hate the main character have for her father is like a vicious cycle and it feels so real. I wonder why the father did what he did—calling her daughter to sit by the radio on the 18th birthday. Surely there is a motive behind but I couldn't see what the motive was. It made me curious. I wonder why the main character did not seek her mother but hungered for her father's love instead. It seems there is more to the story than it's told. A strong, structure of the story, how the premise was introduced, how it developed, how it peaked and how it ended. I love how you describe the emotions and connect them with a physical description. It makes the flow so natural, like I'm there in the character's head, experiencing the pain. You nailed this story. Well done! *Heart*

*Owl3* Typos/ Grammar:
None spotted.

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* Unfortunately, that was just another one of my childish dreams where he was concerned, and I had shelves of them. Instead, we would stumble in and out of each other’s lives for decades to come. Until now.
I found this expression very unique and love the descriptions especially "shelves of them".

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

** Image ID #1882804 Unavailable **

*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*GREETINGS!!!*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* General Comments:
Wait! What just happened? Margret called the police only to have her little brother handcuffed? Her little brother was the one who threw the bottles at her? Why on earth would he do that? He was drunk, wasn't he? This is a great story. I could feel how frustrated Margret was. I mean, just days ago, we had a cat meowing at 5am when we could have slept in before going to work later. I'm already imagining horrible things I could do with the dog. Sleep is very, very important. Why did Misty run into Margret's house though? No, I thought I got the story. I didn't get it. Please tell me. I like the flow of the story. I thought it was dramatic enough. Great premise. I like the dialogue. Characters are believable. I still didn't get the story. *Laugh* I must be suffering from dumb reader syndrome. *Laugh* Still, I think this story is very well-written. *Rainbowl**Rainbowr**Star*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
These are just suggestions. Feel free to leave it out if you disagree.
*Duck* "Damn!" She growled checking the time on her phone: "1 a.m. and I have a job interview at 8.
*Duck* Then, she went out the backdoor and walked quickly to the fence between the two yard.
*Duck* Then, she began throwing doggie treats over the fence.
*Duck* When the box was empty, she started to go back into the house, but a radio came on.

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* Thirty minutes later, Margret stood on her front porch watching as the police took Joel away in handcuffs and Misty ran into her house.
I like this part because this sentence turned the whole story around, even though I haven't quite figure out what happened. *Rolling*

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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Review of The Librarian  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
This is a review brought to you by:
Click to go to WDC Power Reviewers
*Burstr**Bursto**Bursty**Burstg**Burstb**Burstv*"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" 
Celebrating Equality and Diversity*Burstv**Burstb**Burstg**Bursty**Bursto**Burstr*

*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*GREETINGS!!!*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* Overall Impressions/ Random Chatter:
Believe it or not, this is the first LGBT piece that I've reviewed so far in the history of my life. *Laugh* I like the storyline; I've to admit that it is somewhat predictable. (Yes, I expected that twin sister to appear.) I would have preferred to be surprised. This piece makes an awesome teen shorties though for an easy read. I like the characters you've painted so far and I enjoyed reading how you made me feel how the characters felt. Very well described. There is something that stood out for me - the jokes/ the punchline/ the sarcasm. I love them but they didn't have a differentiation or a variety of tone to define that they came from different people, if you get what I mean? I guess it's kinda common in chick flicks (may I call it so?) I enjoyed the dialogues. They are very well written. I absolutely love how you describe the clothes your character wore made her 'own the library'. *Laugh* “Less wishing, more doing.” --> I heard this on TV before. *Laugh* Just had to say I noticed that. Overall, I enjoyed reading your story. You are a good writer. The story flows well. The structure is tight. Neat. Keep going! I'm a fan! *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Typos/ Grammar:
No typos found. Hoorayy!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* She flung open her wardrobe and rummaged through the choices. The threadbare rags she wore on excavations were useless, and her interview-cum-funeral dress was too formal. However, she had a new Timberland lumberjack jacket in purple and pink tartan, a nice blue T-shirt and a matching hair ribbon. After donning this fresh outfit, she checked herself in the mirror. Yeah! She looked as good as Cynthia Rose in Pitch Perfect. She could strut onto that stage and sing Give Me Everything Pitbull style. Nobody was going to keep this girl down. She clenched her fists. She owned that library.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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Review of She wanted him  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

** Image ID #1882804 Unavailable **

*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*GREETINGS!!!*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Overall Impressions/ Random Chatter:
I found it interesting that you chose to write this piece with a second person perspective, which is a rather rare choice. Everything is just so smooth for the main character (i.e. she got what she wants). And now, I know what is your idea of an awesome party. *Laugh* I guess this is what you call a flash fiction. It's short and sweet. You told an interesting story with very little words. I like how you revealed to the readers what's going on inside the lady's head, how you introduced the situation and the problem, then the solution and a resolution. It's very neatly structured and a lot achieved in a mere 298-word piece. Great flow, simple but effective characterisation, mostly focused on the main character, apt description to move the story along. I love most how you described the main character's yearning for the guy. Great job!

*Owl3* Typos/ Grammar:
*Duck* There was meat... so the barbeque was a great success.

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* There was meat with and without spices, delicious salads, and French bread; there were bubbles, there was music and good weather, so the barbecue was a great success.
*Trainp* Her head was in a spin, and it was very difficult to keep her wits about it.
*Trainp*... she saw that he knew what she was up to. And he played along. They both had a wonderful hour of fun.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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Review of Dog Gone Nights  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

** Image ID #1882804 Unavailable **

*PartyHatB**CakeB**GiftG**BalloonR*HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!*BalloonR**GiftG**CakeB**PartyHatB*


*Owl3* Overall Impressions/ Random Chatter:
I'm so glad I read this. You are a great story teller. This is just a simple story about how a person overcomes his or her dilemma with a dog but because of your exceptional storytelling skills, you have turned the whole story into an engaging drama. The characters are vividly painted. I absolutely love your style. The plot is simple. I like how complete everything feels. You told us the problem, you gave us the obstacle and you gave us the solution. It had every element of an engaging story that keeps the readers reading, sympathising with the main character, feeling his or her frustration, then satisfying them with the outcome. The story flows not just well but very naturally too, in a way that unfolds one event after another. There's never a dull moment in your story. I like the voice and structure of the story too. It's clever, calculative, and sarcastic. I love your choice of vocabs such as 'revisiting the crime scene', 'clearly, this was not the answer', 'manic, midnight moment', 'ill-gotten gains', just to name a few. The story is also very organised. Plus, that title? I think it is a wonderful title for this story. And also, I noticed that image. You had that image made especially for this story? Just wow. You are a very good writer. I should dig around your port some more. Yeah. I think I've read your detective stories before and I think they are simply awesome too but I didn't review them cause I thought I've reviewed one before. Now, I'm confused. But I digress. Great job on this piece, Ԝ€ß☆ԜiʈCH ! You totally deserved that awardicon. *Star**Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
None spotted. Hooorayyy!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* He stared up at me with those cold dark gang banger eyes where a conscience does not exist, and just growled. I watched those sharp teeth clinging on to the ill-gotten gains.
*Trainp* That dog and I, well let’s just say we had ourselves this little understanding.
*Trainp* This smart-ass part pit bull, but mostly ugly mutt with an attitude, found solace in my garbage container as the midnight hour approached. Needless to say, the sound of metal bins being rattled and tossed about is not conducive to a good night's sleep. Naturally, seeing the strewn garbage all over the yard in the light of day made me feel a little distraught.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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Review of Raising Rabbits  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

** Image ID #2111174 Unavailable **


Welcome to "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" 
*Cat* *Dog1* *Lizard* *Wolf* *Horse* *Fox* Love your Pet/Animal Awareness Raid. *Cat* *Dog1* *Lizard* *Wolf* *Horse* *Fox*


*PartyHatB**CakeB**GiftG**BalloonR*HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!*BalloonR**GiftG**CakeB**PartyHatB*


*Owl3* Overall Impressions/ Random Chatter:
You've always managed to make us laugh with your stories. So far, I've only read your animal pieces and hey, what a coincidence that it was your birthday and the WDC Power Reviewer Raid on Animals and Pets. You have a thing about rabbits don't you? Well, I have a thing for bunnies and they are pretty much the same thing, I reckon. *Laugh* The storyline is awesome, as usual. The story flows well. The characters are interesting and revealed in the dialogue. The dialogue is very engaging and hillarious too. It told most of the story. I'd call this a drama comedy. I like the structure. Well, it's very natural. I like both the characters, how the male is getting worked out and the female is playing the all innocent role. Funnily, I can actually relate to this story. I brought home two guinea pigs once when my dad consented it, thinking that they were like guinea pig bags. *Rolling* The confrontation was something like that, funny but not as funny as what you wrote. *Laugh* Thanks for sharing! Great job! *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Suggestions:
*Duck* “How was the rabbit raising conference, or whatever you went to?

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* “Sheesh! Rabbits…THREE rabbits…you know that upcoming horse seminar you wanted to attend. You’re not going!”
*Trainp* “I’m going to kill you, then they’ll just die a natural death of dehydration and starvation.”
*Trainp* “We could always put an air conditioner in the garage…”

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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49
49
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

** Image ID #1882804 Unavailable **

*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*GREETINGS!!!*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* Overall Impressions/ Random Chatter:
I was on my way to do something else, properly thanking you for your generosity, when I stumbled upon your Hook to Book item and that shiny star. I then remembered that you actually won Hook to Book and got curious so I poked around. Damn. IT'S GOOD! You deserved to win it. I haven't seen the rest of your port so, if you haven't finished the story yet, please, please, please, please, please finish the story. I LOVE it. It is so 'publishable'.You can get someone to illustrate your story and turn it into a children's story book and write a series. This is DAMN good. It's a perfect story for children. I would love this read this sort of story when I was a kid. Actually, I still like to read it now, as an adult. I love all the characters, the dialogues and all you wrote are the first and last chapter and already made a very good impression. How did you do that? Your writing is clear, concise. I love the style, the structure and I don't usually read fables (I recently learnt this term here at WDC) but this is really AWESOME!!! Characters are very well defined. The flow is great. The story and plot are awesome. Everything is so funny. It warmed my heart. I loved every single bit of it. The flow is great. The story is very creatively done too. Losing a rhyme? Adding a little mystery to it? Getting things stuck? *Rolling* Full marks for that. The names are awesome too. Short and very easy to remember for a child. Very catchy too. Jody, great job and well done! You are a damn good writer. I give you that. The simpler the writing, the harder it is to write. That's something I'll always remember. I can't help but wonder how long it took you to write this piece. (I can't imagine how it would be when you write about unicorns.) *Laugh* *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Typos/ Grammar:
None spotted. Hooorayyy!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
Well, since I can't copy and paste your entire story...

*Trainp* Before he was even half way there, Kat came scurrying up, “Sheriff! Sheriff! I need your help!”

Sam immediately noticed there was a problem. She wasn’t speaking in rhymes.

“Sheriff! I’ve lost them!” She began to cry.

“Lost what?”

“My rhymes! I’ve lost my rhymes!” she howled in tears.

*Trainp* “Howdy, Mayor Squirrel,” and he tipped his hat.

I actually loved the argument between Kat and Sam when Kat kept correcting Sam but I can't copy and paste the entire dialogue. *Laugh* These two dialogues were the highlight for me. And the rhyming of course, when Kat finally got her rhyme back. *Laugh*

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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50
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Review of Knock Knock  
Review by Elycia Lee ☮
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a review brought to you by: "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" .

** Image ID #2108288 Unavailable **

This review is done in conjunction with "Invalid Item" 


*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*GREETINGS!!!*Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Owl3* Overall Impressions/ Random Chatter:
Now I know your secret. You are a cannibal, aren't you? *Rolling* This story is very well-written. I think you've nailed it. Nice style. I like the structure of the story. I like how you told the story from the first person's point of view. It added the mystery to urge readers to go on reading to find out more about the story. I like how you set the mood of the story and introduced the characters, especially the dog. *Laugh* The piece is creative. Engaging. Flows rather well. How you ended it was just plain scary... Are you going to eat me for reading your piece? What if you do? Maybe I should stop reading this now. Or you might eat me. Angus, you are not a writer if you have no readers. You cannot eat your readers. You cannot. *Rolling* I'm scared now. I'll just scurry away. I think you did a great job by the way. And well done. And no, I'm not saying this out of fear. I think you really did well. *Star* *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Owl3* Typos/ Grammar:
None spotted. Hoorayyy!!!

*Owl3* Favourite Parts:
*Trainp* Angus?/ Shh. Not now.
*Trainp* Luther! Go lay down. Luther.../ Damn dog.
*Trainp* Angus?/ Yeah, Seumas?/ Me belly's a'rumblin'. Will we be having the young lad for supper tonight?/ Not tonight, Seumas. Not tonight. You know we have to let the meat hang for a few days.

Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! *Heart*


Elycia Lee ☮

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