Overall: This was a good story. The end went to fast. I think you should say what happened after she found out that he was an angel sent from heaven. I loved the idea though. But you should expand on it.
Setting: You described the surroundings a lot.
Charactors: The main charactor's feelings at the end should be expressed. I liked the other charactors too.
Overall: This was the best poems I've read in a long time. You have a sort of unique ingeniousness that makes you a good author. It's amazing how you can go from grass to death. I don't know anyone that could do that!
Voice: Original. Loved it.
Grammer/Spelling: Perfect.
Improvements: Unfortunately none. :}
I enjoyed reading an interesting view of explaining death. Keep it up!
My comments: I think your poem needs some little adjustments. It flows but the ending "my love" is too repeditive and distracts the reader. Also, I didn't really feel what you were trying to express so maybe you could use some stronger words of feeling and emotion. Otherwise you could build on to what you already have by gradually adding a story or by describing this man in detail. You have a good foundation, you just need to look over it some more.
DON'T GIVE UP! Romantic poems are tough but like I said you almost have it down.
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/cbrookbank423
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.20 seconds at 11:28am on Apr 26, 2024 via server web2.