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85 Public Reviews Given
114 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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26
26
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Jacque,


Errors & Solutions

Sorry, finally found a typo -
Stanza 6
Thru valleys and on rocky rillshills,
(c:red}Stanza 7
To let our light snine bfore shine before men.

What I liked/Disliked.

Again, what can I say but you have a gift for portraying so much with the written word.


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Helen
27
27
Review of Upon My Death  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Jacque,

Wow, AGAIN!

Errors & Solutions

Sorry I am no help here as I don't think you should change a word.

Other Comments

Well, what can I say. Fantastic. I RR&R a few of your items now, and I can't help but be impressed.

You have the ability to have the emotion and feelings shine through the written words.

Keep on writing,


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Helen
28
28
Review of Hilltops  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Jacque,

A very interesting poem.

Errors & Solutions

Just a few suggestions. I feel maybe braking up each of the stanzas into further stanzas.

Suggest deleting the below words to increase flow.
And Still I rang on

AndOpening my eyes

I feel that with the 'and' words in those lines it altered the flow, by deleting them I feel that the flow of words will continue through the whole poem.

Other Comments

Again, very insightful writing.

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Helen
29
29
Review of What Now?  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Jacque,

Wow, I don't think I have every read another piece of poetry that has touched me as much as 'What Now?'.

Well done.

Errors & Solutions

Sorry, I have no suggestions to make. Don't change a thing. Perfect as it is.

What I liked/disliked.

Again, loved all of it. Cannot find any faults.


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Helen
30
30
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Jacque

I am glad to get to know you a little better.

Errors & Solutions

Can't fault you on spelling or grammar, although I felt that it being in one paragraph doesn't give the reader time to take a breathe. I would suggest inserting a paragraph after the second sentence.

A 2nd paragraph commencing with the sentence 'I was an "army brat" ... would also help the flow.

What I liked/disliked
Well as I mentioned earlier, it was great to get to know you a little better.

You have managed to tell a lot of information with just a few words and managed to avoid becoming too wordsy.

Well done.

Helen


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