A very nice look at marriage, something I'm not all that familiar, which is a testament to how interesting your writing is as it didn't feel as if it would exclude anyone who wasn't familiar with the topic. It's an original love poem, which is hard to find, and I liked it a lot.
I think this is a very nice poem. Its description of nature is very interesting and I enjoyed it thoroughly. Its view on the nature it describes is actually quite delightful.
This is very interesting, and actually a rather enjoyable letter to read. I originally assumed that you gained all your knowledge of the subject from the count of Monte cristo movie, which is an insult to the book in my opinion, using different names and too much of a variation on the story. And yet you built an interesting, genuine piece that felt like it came from a genuine source. I'm very glad I've been proven wrong.
I like this poem a lot. None too exciting, but nit trying to be whatsoever, it's description is fantastically enjoyable and really draws in the reader. The nature of the weather really comes alive in a way that is truly impressive.
Well done for writing a song on here, I think it is refreshing, actually. It seems like a fairly decent ballad-y kind of deal though I have to admit an absence of music makes it almost impossible to review. Now the lyrics aren't amazing, if I'm being honest but they seem as if they would work well if put with an acoustic guitar or piano.
There is a great sadness to this poem that sincerely affects the reader. The wonderful thing about it is that the sadness, in only eight lines manages to become home. This is an excellent example of a 'less is more' approach to poetry and you utilize subtlety very expertly.
This is an extremely humorous poem. I didn't expect to enjoy it but I was wrong as it amused me very much. It's very bizarre and original and I think that sets it apart from other humorous poetry. Very fun indeed, a really nice poem as it also manages to be rather meaningful as well as extremely amusing. Well done.
I like this piece. I think the description and layout is well used, but it is by no means clever or groundbreaking. It's very sweet and it works well autobiographically but I'm afraid the whole, 'my dad is my favorite celebrity,' angle is predictable and kind of old hat. I hate to say this as I'm sure he is a great man who you love very much and would hate to take away from that, but it's a bit 'old 70s sitcom,' to tell the truth. You convey your love for him well though, and give a good feel for your life, which raised your rating.
This poem is very interesting. It is atypical and at first eema rather unappealing, but, upon further reading I found it very enjoyable. I adore originality and, primarily for that reason, this poem intrigued me very much. I think the imagery and sounds are well impressed and your message is very clear. Well done and thank you very much,
This poem is not badly written, nor are the rhymes overly amateur or cliched. And yet I did not enjoy it at all. I must emphasize that it is a well written and easy to read poem but its subject matternis somewhat pointless and it isn't particularly funny, if thy I what you were going for. Still, you gain from originality, so you have saved yourself on that respect.
This poem actually manages to say quite a bit in the few lines that make it up. It lacks originality in some places but is still quite a bit more interesting than certain other poems that boast a shorter format. I enjoyed it, and didn't expect to and I think that the subject matter was dealt with very well.
This poem is rather average. The rhyme and rhythm is fine and it's difficult to find a problem with it other than the fact that it is somewhat unexciting. There seems to be a lack of feeling behind it, as if you're writing a poem that you think is the type of thing a poet would write about, and yet don't feel all that strongly about the subject. You would be better off writing bad poetry about something you are passionate about, in my opinion. Again, it is difficult to find anything wrong with this poem, which implies you have talent, you must simply turn it towards something you genuinely believe in.
I don't know, I'm growing increasingly disheartened by the poetry on this site. Every line reminds the reader of how desperate you were for a rhyme, bending and twisting sentences so that the last words would sound alike. That's not what poetry is about and if you think it is you shouldn't be writing it. Farther doesn't rhyme with hunger. Also the meaning of this poem is desperately unclear. Not abstract, not metaphorical, not even complicated, just badly suggested and outlined. Sorry if I seem rude, I'm a nice guy, usually.
Not messing, this is my favourite poem I've read since I joined this site last year. Wonderful, any chance of getting some back story or explanation to it? Sorry if that's inconvenient, but I really love it.
I like this poem a lot. You said you don't read much poetry, well that hasn't hindered your skill at all. I'll be honest, it's not amazing but it's quite good. Lines like 'many tears I have spilt,' can often sound forced, something you avoid quite well. I would usually enjoy syntax switches like this as they can slow the rhythm, but, as I said, this isn't a problem in your poem.
I remember checking the symbolism of a yellow rose back when I was writing the poem, it's a symbol of friendship, though it was a symbol of jealousy way back in the day.
I enjoyed this, the rhyme scheme is expertly done, though the point is kind of difficult to see. It's a very proud poem and I think it very much does itself justice.
Just wondering, are you from Ireland or are you of Irish descent?
I don't know if I can see much of a point to this, I'm sorry.
The fact that there is nothing there is unexciting. The reader is never once tricked into thinking that maybe, jut maybe, he might be surrounded by horrible creatures, we never feel his fear.
I also think this piece could work if you built more tension and not have him discover he was alone so quickly.
I clicked into this poem as I too am fascinated by the night sky(take a look at my own poem, 'Immensity and Me' 'http://www.Writing.Com/main/view_item/item_id/1728730-Immensity-and-Me)
However, your poem left me rather disappointed.
It is very amateur in poetry when you work a line around a word just because or rhymes with the end of the last line. It feels forced and really takes away from the flow of the poem. If the you have to mess around with the syntax or use words in a way that doesn't even make sense, for example, your use of 'assistance.'
This is utterly pointless. It is very basic what you are doing as well as being predictable and unintriguing. I must admit, I find myself convinced that those who have reviewed your piece are people who are dumbfounded by the adoration of God. The sentiment is very pleasant but it is a waste of time. The content of the piece was almost exactly the same as it's description, which strips it of any depth or the necessary subtlety needed to convey such emotion.
I'm very sorry but this is my honest opinion,
Thanks for your time,
Jack
Very interesting, fantastically bleak(I have a story entitle 362: Future of humanity, that dabbles in a similar bleak outlook)
Very engaging, right from the beginning and a perfect layout, if a bit short. My one problem is that the solution seems somewhat pointless. Perhaps I misread but as far as I an gather, young, immune people are being bred to facilitate the needs of the older ones. I think that might seem a little redundant after a while.
This poem is amazing. It's the most wonderfully heartbreaking, genuine piece I've read since I joined this website.
Obviously I'm so sorry about the truth behind it and I know I couldn't imagine the pain of it but if I ever had a chance it would be by reading this poem. You take the reader into your world beautifully and put yourself out there in a completely honest way.
I always check the portfolios of those who review my work and for once I am so glad I did.
Wonderful. Also please forgive any spelling errors, this was written quickly!
This poem is ridden with angst. I'm sorry but the frustrated, isolated teenager angle has Bern done to death, so much so that you have to try extra hard for it to earn you sympathy, which, let's face it, is the underlying theme of all poems like this, a release of sadness. However, as all teenagers(and yes I am one!) feel shunted and mistreated even though that is rarely the case, there is a general ignorance that seems to come with this type of poem. It comes across as attention-seeking and forced, spoiled even.
Now, I don't know if you're a teen or if you maybe wrote it during your teens but it most definitely seems like a stereotypical teenage 'everyone is against me and I'm all numb' poem.
This Is really quite interesting, though I'm sure you understand thy it needs to be expanded upon. I'm not sure ig it's supposed to be the opening chapter of a book or what but if it is you definitely need some more in-depth descriptions at least. Not bad, better than a lot I've seen in this site.
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