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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/jimjam3442/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/3
Review Requests: OFF
145 Public Reviews Given
146 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I read as if I'm watching a movie, and try to focus on the story as much as I can. If something you wrote stands out in my mind, I'll tell you.
I'm good at...
Story, pacing, diologue.
Favorite Genres
Fantasy, Crime, Horror, Sci-Fi, anything that's good, really, but those are my favorites.
Favorite Item Types
Chapters, short stories.
Least Favorite Item Types
I'm no poet, but sometimes I can pick out a good one.
I will not review...
I'll review anything if you ask nicely. ;)
Public Reviews
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51
51
Review by J.M. Arlen
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
im confused, did he kill her? the story was very very welly written up until the last part, very confusing. i liked it though, painted a nice picture. but if he was actually sawing her in half by the end, then i dont think you should start the story the way you did. good luck and keep writing!
52
52
Review by J.M. Arlen
Rated: 13+ | (1.5)
daves wife causing the accident makes no sense. sorry but reading this just felt like a wast of time. also! how many exclamation points do you need! is everyone yelling all the time! the writing style was too quick!
and although the ending wasnt what i expected, it only was unexpected because it makes no sense. i assumed it would have ended with allie killing someone, maybe even daves wife, but daves wife, who from what we as the readers understand, is that daves wife diesnt go out that much, and just sits around waiting for dave to pay for the bills. so why would she be running a red light? also why the hell doesnt dave recognize his own silver car?
53
53
Review of To The Last  
Review by J.M. Arlen
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
the writing style was great, and i was able to picture everything you described very well. my only gripe is that in the end it turned to a love story. the way that kane talks about annette makes me think he doesnt know her, so why does he grab her hand? the story is what needs work, your writing style is really good, put me right in your world. keep writing and good luck!
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