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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/vireo
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10 Public Reviews Given
10 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Let it ring  
Review by vireo
Rated: E | (4.5)
I can feel the sincerity in your writing. Reading this was like a hug for my heart. I like the simplicity of the poem; the topic of love is something a lot of people complicate, however, you simplified the subject as well as your very wise message. I can tell the last line was meant to be the "punch" of the poem but it seemed out of place and didn't carry the intensity it should have. I also believe the poem could be stronger if it had a specific meter. A meter would give the poem a heartbeat. Overall, beautiful poem and a beautiful message.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Let it Begin  
Review by vireo
Rated: E | (4.0)
Beautiful message about staying strong during hard times.
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Review of Kasdeya  
Review by vireo
Rated: E | (4.5)
This was very entertaining from start to finish! I especially loved the subcontext; I believe it's an important message all children should know. That being said, I think this would be great as a children's book with illustrations! I encourage you to team up with an illustrator (or use your own artistic skills) to bring this story to life!
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Review of What it means  
Review by vireo
Rated: E | (4.0)
The context of this is very comforting, however, the grammatical errors throughout the piece make it difficult to read/understand. Try retyping it in Word or Google Docs; it'll be easier to edit as it highlights errors as you type. Overall this piece is beautiful in context! Keep it up!
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Review of My Own Thoughts  
Review by vireo
Rated: E | (4.5)
Interesting read and good points. If you're interested in furthering your study/thought, I would suggest elaborating on the modern day evils that plague the world and compare them to those depicted in the bible. I think adding such examples would help readers make the connection between the world's decline and the bible's predictions. Your claim about focusing on children was interesting too but what exactly should we be teaching them? To prepare for the end of the world? To be better people than older generations? Overall, this was a very thoughtful piece and I enjoyed it!
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Review of The Struggle  
Review by vireo
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This was painful to read but only because you described the feelings of depression so well. Writing about something so distressing and conveying such emotions can be extremely hard; so with that being said, I applaud your execution of this impassioned poem!
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